Episode 2 - How Men can become Great Orgasmic Providers through Taontric Massage with Richard Anton Diaz
Transcript
Transcript
How Men can become Great Orgasmic Providers through Taontric Massage
Transcript
[commercial/explicit content warning]
[intro music and clips from show to come]
Dr. Patti Taylor: Welcome to the Expanded Lovemaking Show. I’m your host, Dr. Patti Taylor. Today on the show, we’re talking about men and how they can become great orgasmic providers for women. What man doesn’t want to be known for being a great lover? Today you’re going to here from someone who has brought all varieties of pleasure to hundreds of women, all from the art of sensual mastery. Our guest today is Richard Anton Diaz. Now Anton, I’ve taught at Sexy Spirits for many years so I’ve always known you as Anton. Can I call you that?
Anton Diaz: That would be perfect. [laughs]
Dr. Patti Taylor: Ok, great! Welcome Anton.
Anton Diaz: Thank you. Thank you for having me on your show Patti.
Dr. Patti Taylor: You’re welcome. Well now, let me tell you a little bit about Anton. He’s a man of many talents. He’s trained extensively in body work and is considered one of New York’s foremost givers of Taontric massage. He teaches expanded orgasm, which I understand is a very sought after qualification. He’s also a certified Taoist instructor who’s trained directly under Master Mantak Chia, arguably the most renowned instructor of this art alive today. Anton also promotes community in a major way. He founded New York City’s Sexy Spirits in 1990. This currently thriving organization is a sex positive educational center specializing in the uprising of consciousness through Tantric, Taoist and modern sexual energy teaching. Anton, I know you’ve seen a lot of men and women come through Sexy Spirits in the last 17 years. Not only are you a generous source of wisdom, but you’re a hot and juicy one too. People want to learn from you. I’ve been to Sexy Spirits many times and your students consistently rave about your teachings and your touch. I’m looking forward to finding out directly from you the secrets and techniques you’re teaching everyone that are so popular with your students – and with the ladies. So I’m really happy to have you here today. I think our listeners really care about how men can become better, if not master, providers of pleasure for women. And I’m sure that women would love to learn more about how to encourage and guide their men to become ever better lovers. Anton, I want to talk to you about how men can begin winning with the women in their lives. What are the main benefits that men can enjoy by learning to become better, if not great, lovers? And what is Taontric massage and how can one learn to receive or give one? Let’s get started.
Anton Diaz: Sure.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Let’s start with men and how they can begin winning with the women in their life. You teach something called Taontric massage and other body oriented work to men. So maybe you could just tell us a little bit about what it is you’re teaching.
Anton Diaz: Sure Patti. I’d like to start off by just letting men know how they can win with the women in their lives, and believe me, I think every man wants to win with women. I just want to start out by saying I was not always a winner with women. I was married for 12 years, had a wonderful relationship that finally ended when I stopped competing in ballroom dancing. I wouldn’t say I was the greatest winner with my wife back then. To this day we are the greatest and most devoted of friends. So it’s important for men to know first off that this is not something I was born with, it is something I learned. I went through some pretty significant stages.
The three main stages I went through, and this is the main thing I want to impact men with, is that I went through this young macho man kind of stage at the beginning. And then, eventually I was kind of shot down enough in my middle ages and we tend to finally let go of a lot and you go to the extreme, you become what I would call a new age wimp kind of guy. The third phase that I developed was what I call being a self loved man, a man that finally comes into really true love with himself. So that’s the beginning of what men need to know. They really need to know how to come in to really loving themselves as a person.
Dr. Patti Taylor: So do you think that you teach – you teach Taontric massage, Expanded Orgasm, the Taoist practices – is it the teachings themselves that impart the information?
Anton Diaz: Well, the wonderful thing about Taontric massage, and I would love our audience to be aware that when I say Taontric I’m not saying Tantric – tan, I’m saying Taontric which is spelled T A O N T R I C, so it’s a word that brings together both Taoist and Tantric principles. The beauty is that through touch we as man can actually practice how to be a better man with women without going through the trial and error process that most of us have to do by being in a relationship. Not that relationships are not valuable and important; we all really grow our best through relationships. But many go from relationship to relationship and kind of keep making most of the mistakes that we made in the previous relationship. Through touch and through learning how to touch we can actually bypass that trial and error system and actually engage in with practice with friends, with lovers with, gosh, just about with anybody and practice the most valuable techniques on emotional and intimate connection that we make with our partners. We can all do it within an hour, within three hours. Just think, you can within three hours gain a lifetime of experience that you would gain in a relationship that could either succeed or not succeed. And you can take that information and bring it to the next person, and then bring that new information to the next person. If you’re fortunate enough to then engage with a true relationship with someone you have practiced this beautiful way to be with a woman and you’re not having to trial and error and learn. You’re actually now playing a winning game that you know you have greater certainty with and that you know you’re going to win with and that you know that the woman you are going to be with is going to be absolutely happy with.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Ok, so there’s a man and he wants to start winning with the woman in his life. Most women want a man who’s going to be intimate and romantic and loving, I mean those are the images we have out in the society. So how would touch specifically begin to fit the solution that you say it does?
Anton Diaz: Well, I know this much. I know that every person deep in their heart is looking for that one true love. And if we accept that as true whether reality says it’s an illusion or not we all still have that deep urge to connect with our soul mate or our partner. Well pretty much when we meet a person we either know whether that person – we know in a pretty quick amount of time whether that person is that person or is not that person. Or we have an idea that they might be that person, we don’t know. When we actually communicate that, and this is what I do, when I communicate to a woman I communicate that exact thing that I told you. I say, “you know, we’re all looking for a deep, deep person to connect with and I have a way of becoming connected with you in such a way that you can learn more about me and I can learn more about you and yet we won’t give up who we are, a part of ourselves as a price tag for that. And through this touch it’s a way that we are able to engage in intimate expression with one another and we might kind of bypass actual sex or intercourse for a while because as soon as we engage in that type of sexual intimacy we then pull in all the aspects of family and reproduction that kind of have us hard wired to how we’re going to react with a partner.
Dr. Patti Taylor: So you might actually become a better lover by engaging in this Taontric massage. Could you give us an example of what that might look like?
Anton Diaz: Sure. When I make a date with a women to have a touching session I tell her I’m going to have a beautiful room set up with beautiful music and beautiful candles and I’m going to have food set up for her and I’m going to give her the most beautiful touch and I want her to totally be in a receiving mode, not to have any attention whatsoever on giving me anything back because just by the mere fact of the way I’m going to be touching her and pleasing her that’s going to be giving me back a lot on its own. So right away I tell her that I would love to give her a pure session where my full attention is going to be on her and that my intention is to have her just simply enjoy what my touch will bring and that there’s no expectation of anything that that touch has to bring, simply her own relaxation, enjoyment and pleasure. So that’s how it begins.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Wow. That sounds really great. So I know you teach this stuff and I’m just wondering, do women say, “Oh my boyfriend would never do that,” or do the men say, “Gee I don’t want to look like a wimp”? I mean, do you have to run up against any stereotypes or do you find that people are really thrilled to get the chance to go beyond the stereotypes and express themselves this way. What are the reactions you’re finding at Sexy Spirits since you’re teaching people?
Anton Diaz: The first thing I do – that is a great question because I have found that in the beginning whenever I tried to talk about this I had all of those normal barriers and those normal defenses came up. But I figured a great way around that. I simply hold a demonstration. And I hold it usually two weeks prior to any workshop and it’s called a lecture demonstration on Taontric massage and Expanded Orgasm. I invite people to come watch me perform what I do on a partner and sometimes I even invite anybody from the audience to come and experience this touch. People immediately see right away a sense of energy exchange that begins to happen between me and my person that’s quite rare and unique and it answers so many of their questions. And quite often every woman in that room wants to be on that table. And every man in that room wants to be in that position where they have the knowledge that I have that can bring the pleasure that they see that I’m bringing to the person that I have on that table.
Dr. Patti Taylor: So if you’re single is this a great way to meet women or if you’re married is this a good way to get a woman in the mood? How do you fit Taontric massage into an already busy life, how do you add it into your life? Is it just something that stands alone? How do you add it in once you learn it?
Anton Diaz: Well, let’s put it this way Patti. I have a beautiful relationship with a woman who’s been living with me for two years and even with her and all the massages I still have time for at least four partners a week that I see on a regular basis. I make the time to practice, to learn how to bring this touch deeper into a more connective intimate space with them. And I become better and better and better at what I do so it sure beats, for me, going to the movies or going out on a dinner date. Not to say that those things aren’t great, we certainly can do those afterwards but I make this a priority because when I do Taontric massage and go on these dates and these women that have just found so much trust in me to let me . . .
Dr. Patti Taylor: We’re going to have to go to a break pretty soon but you told a story that you do this kind of massage as a demonstration when you go out to certain parties and you actually have women and men lining up for hours. Do you want to tell us about that just to have you give an example of what you’re doing?
Anton Diaz: Sure, absolutely. When I go to special parties that are sex positive and open environments I peel out my table and I invite women to come and experience my touch. And a lot of them have no idea what I’m going to do and they usually are very suspicious. They ask me whether they have to take their clothes off or not and I say absolutely not, you can just lie on the table and feel my touch and kind of follow where you go. Once they feel my touch they immediately feel the attention and the place that I come from. Ever since I’ve started these I have women now that the minute I get there they just get on the sign up list very quickly. And the men get on a sign up list to learn how to do this because they like the line that they see I get.
Dr. Patti Taylor: So clearly one way for men to begin winning with women in their life would be to learn how to offer these massages.
Anton Diaz: Oh 100%.
Dr. Patti Taylor: So we’re going to take a short break from our sponsor and we will be right back with Anton. I will tell you that you can find out more about Anton by visiting his website. It’s at www.sexyspirits.com. We’ll be right back.
[commercial]
Dr. Patti Taylor: Hi, I’m Dr. Patti and I’m with Anton. We’re talking about how men can become great orgasmic providers for women. Before the break we were talking about how men can win with the women in their lives. I want to ask you now about the main benefits that men can enjoy by learning to become better, if not great, lovers Anton. You teach something called Sexual Energy Cultivation Practices. What are they?
Anton Diaz: Well these are wonderful probably Rolls Royce practices, sexual energy cultivation that men can learn where they really master their own sexual energy. These wonderful practices enable men to have much clearer minds, emotional management, which is I think one of the most valuable tools a man or a woman can have, greater health, greater longevity, these are all the key wonderful practices that I learned through the Taoist practices through Master Mantak Chia which to this day he still teaches.
Dr. Patti Taylor: So what would be some of the benefits, I mean, does the man last longer in bed, does he develop his emotional body? Does he get more stamina? Does he become more sensitive? What are some of the benefits like that?
Anton Diaz: All of the above Patti. [laughs] I would have to say that the greatest benefit that a man realizes through these practices is that he evolves more fully and deeply in to his role as a man as is defined by the culture he lives in. because every culture and every community kind of defines, what is the man’s role. The beauty is that the man, in embodying that role, is not doing that role by any kind of social dictate. He’s doing it purely as a game. And when a man plays a game of really being a man and really being a guy with a woman, he can have incredible amounts of fun no matter where he goes with women because he’s really engaged in the role that he knows are going to turn women on. So I would say that’s the number one benefit. He gets a clear sense of his distinction of his role as a man.
Dr. Patti Taylor: So you’re saying that these increased intimacy skills and heightened energy awareness are going to supercharge your lovemaking and your massage way more than any technique.
Anton Diaz: I would say that’s absolutely true. I would say, Patti, and I’ve heard this from one of my greatest teachers, her name is Dr. Patricia Taylor, [laughter] and it is so true what she says. She says that 25% of learning and the power of this connection that we make, 25% of it is in the touch and in the technique. 75% is in the intention and in the mindset that we have to be in. and I find that that is so true and actually that’s one of the hardest things I find to teach.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Is that frustrating? Because people come to you looking for technique, technique, and you do teach technique, but you know to impart these things that can’t always be put into words. Is that frustrating because it’s like there’s so much more, how do you really impart that?
Anton Diaz: Very frustrating. But you know again it’s a wonderful challenge as a teacher. That’s why people when they see me do what I do they realize that there’s something that‘s coming actually through my body than actually that my body is doing something to the woman. When men – or when people can see that they realize that there’s a greater truth here. I’ll give you a very quick story of how I first got into this with expanded orgasms that blew my mind. And that was that I remember I was just getting into a position of giving a woman an extended genital stimulation and my teacher came over and just touched my shoulder and relaxed it ever so slightly where I just totally relaxed and the woman under my hand started to have the most wildest orgasm of her life. There and then I saw the power of what was really happening - that this expanded orgasm and that this wonderful touch technique that was giving a woman so much pleasure was actually my ability to be very empty and to be very clean in my space as to what I wanted to provide. - almost to be a transmitter of this greater power and this greater energy coming through me.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Yeah, so it’s almost that we need to go beyond the message that our society has been giving us that it’s about looks. You’re an incredibly gorgeous man, I mean you just turn on the whole room, you’re radiant. What is it? What would you say to men, if you could give them one piece of advice, “Hey, do this tonight”? What would you tell them to do? Right now, men, hear me out, this is [xx] the last ten seconds of your life. Do this tonight, start here. What is it?
Anton Diaz: I would say this. I would say every woman that comes into their life, whether it meets to their particular standard of what they consider attractive or not attractive, can they practice either shaking that woman’s hand or maybe just putting it on that woman’s body as they talk to them, can they practice bringing a sense of unconditional love and a sense of just pure total 100% attention as they deliver that touch and just see and notice that change in the woman. If they can learn how to do that from the very beginning with a simple social situation I think that would be their very first step to learning the more advanced levels and techniques of Taontric massage.
Dr. Patti Taylor: So you see a lot of people come through Sexy Spirits. What are your favorite teachers then? What are the favorite kinds of information? Are they the ones that teach that kind of stuff?
Anton Diaz: Well my favorite, and believe me we’ve had so many educators come through our doors, and I’m far more interested in the ones that are engaging the audience to connect with one another both on physical and energetic levels. The ones that I have trouble with are the ones that do a lot of talking but do not connect people. And I think connection is the number one thing that should be taught and delivered. My two favorites, well, I have many favorites, but my top of the line is, of course, yourself, Dr. Patricia Taylor, you are to me the cream of the crop. I also love Sheri Winston; she is a wonderful educator, a prior registered nurse who just brings such valuable, practical information, right down to the body level. I love it when we talk about the body and . . .
Dr. Patti Taylor: She does, she gets right in there and . . .
Anton Diaz: Exactly.
Dr. Patti Taylor: . . .is very specific about the body. There are not too many people that are really willing to talk about the body in our culture or hook it up to the mind the heart and the spirit.
Anton Diaz: Absolutely. The body is where it all starts.
Dr. Patti Taylor: We’re going to have to take a break pretty soon. I have one quick question maybe we can sneak in before we go to our sponsor. Can you give us a quick story of someone who took one of your classes who had a real breakthrough from learning one of these sexual energy cultivation practices?
Anton Diaz: Sure. Well, I had a gentleman who came in who actually he took privately from me. He was a very wealthy man and he wanted nothing but private instruction and he just didn’t understand why he had so much wealth in his life and yet he just had so much of a disaster with women in his life. I asked him did he know why he as so motivated to make money. And he said well sure, I want this and I want that. Is said let’s dig deeper into that and we kept going under his motivation for why he really wanted to be rich and he came to the conclusion on his own, which I knew he would that the reason why he was making and wanted to make all this money was because he yearned to with that money be able to have as much female connection in his life. And he never knew that that was connected. When he made that connection he actually started to cry because he realized all this time that he had lost that connection. And when he made that connection he began to connect his wealth with the feminine energy, the female energy that he so much desired and it was as simple as that. He’s a happy man right now.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Well that is so beautiful that I’m going to leave on that to take a break. So thank you. We’ll be right back; we’re listening to Anton from Sexy Spirits. This is Dr. Patti Taylor; we’re going to hear from our sponsors. Please stay with us.
[commercial]
Dr. Patti Taylor: We’re back and I’m Dr. Patti Taylor and we’re talking to Anton about how men can become great orgasmic providers for women. Before the break we were talking about the main benefits of Taontric massage and sensual touch. I want to ask you know more about Tantric massage – Taontric massage I should say since you coined the term – and how we can learn to give and receive one. So you did coin the term and so why don’t we start there. What is one?
Anton Diaz: Sure. I would love to make it very easy for our listeners so they can, right after they finish the show, actually start applying it. One of the key things of the Taoist practices is the yin and yang. Everybody remembers yin and yang and knows yin and yang. What most people might not know is that yin and yang are also associated with elements, yin being a water element and yang being a fire element. To even get a little bit deeper the water element has also associated organs in our body. The yin is associated with the kidneys and the fire is associated with the heart. Just on that knowledge alone people can begin to translate that in to touch. Patti, when you think of water what direction does water go in to?
Dr. Patti Taylor: Um, let me think about that – up. No, down. [laughs]
Anton Diaz: [laughs] It goes in a down direction. So we can think of water touch as touches that penetrate downward into the body, that ground the person, that soak into a person, that actually spreads and becomes a big ocean for them. And when we think of the word fire, fire if we think of fire moves in an upward direction. So we can think of touches that have a fire element to them as touches that have the person reaching up for your touch. So it brings the blood in the opposite direction. It begins to go more toward the skin surface and you begin to see a reddening of the skin a more excitation touch. Now with these two touches alone we learn to kind of navigate the body between lowering water touches and rising fire touches. And we can actually begin to climb their energy in a slow valley that slowly ascends upward and upward and upward so that they feel more excited and then slightly grounded and then a little bit more excited and on and on. Just by understanding those concepts alone I’ve been able to teach the concepts of Taontric massages, have people apply that concept in their touches.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Mmm. Well that sounds really yummy. Do you ever add sounds or talking to enhance the experience?
Anton Diaz: You know Patti normally I don’t add any kind of sound. I will add maybe the sound of my breath so that when they feel me exhaling and giving them a nice water touch they’ll really exhale with me. So normally we don’t use sound even though people can use sound. We use maybe just the louder sound of breath to enhance the touching that I do.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Are there particular parts of the body that just crave and soak up this touch in particular or do you, is it all over the body.
Anton Diaz: Yeah Patti, that’s a great question. You know the whole concept of Taontric massage and why I have found it’s such a wonderful prerequisite before leading into any type of genital touches, I treat every single body like a, almost like a clitoris. I give every single cell that I’m touching as if it’s the most pleasurable thing to touch and I do that to the entire body and I actually leave out the genital touches because I want that area screaming for the attention that all the other parts have got. And that’s why this massage really leads so wonderfully into the more extended genital touches that we do later on with expanded orgasm.
Dr. Patti Taylor: You do, I’ve actually seen that. People can actually have an orgasm from one of these Taontric massages.
Anton Diaz: Oh, they absolutely do. I would say that one definitely goes into an orgasmic state and one also goes into a very loving state. And the other state that one goes into and this is probably the most important is they surrender totally. They surrender and are ready to surrender more fully and more deeply into anything that can come on after that.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Yeah, I have to say as a teacher myself of expanded orgasm I love what you teach because it prepares, I mean I think the Taontric massage is amazing because, well first of all it’s unique in and of itself but it also prepares someone; it gets them in the mood. Do you want to talk about that a little bit, how it’s both a complete experience in and of itself and or?
Anton Diaz: Absolutely.
Dr. Patti Taylor: You know, gets them in the mood, I mean, how it could serve either way?
Anton Diaz: Sure. Sure, and here’s how I see it Patti. I see that a woman has this enormous orgasmic ocean inside of her and sometimes that orgasmic ocean is fully available for her and sometimes it’s hidden by caves and it’s hidden by mountains that are covering that ocean. What this Taontric massage does is it enables the woman to come in contact with that very ocean. And when she’s in contact with that ocean of orgasmic energy that’s with her body she now has access to this huge amount of pleasure and energy that she can now with a great driver, which I hope I can be for her, take her around the world as many times as she wants to go.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Wow, that’s hot. [laughs] I think, you know, a lot of people are goal oriented and the beauty of this is it can end here. It’s so complete and fulfilling.
Anton Diaz: Absolutely. You know Patti the beautiful training and gift that a man learns from that is he learns present. And I think one of the greatest virtues that a man can learn in a relationship to a woman is the ability to be present with a woman. And that is present to even her bad side her good side her wild sides her bitchy sides her whatever side that she can throw at him. And believe me, if he’s with a woman long enough she will throw everything, including the kitchen sink.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Yeah, and the irony of that, speaking for myself as a woman is that knowing when I know that it can end now and when I’ve had a phenomenal Taontric massage and it’s been orgasmic, you know what, that’s when I’m turned on out of my mind. And I turn into a tiger and I’m like chasing the guy around the bedroom going come here you animal. [laughs] You know, or I want to end but I mean, half the time it just drives me wildly out of my mind so you know guys out there, I hope your listening. This is insanely turny ony for us girls sometimes too. So presence, and not having a goal can just light my fire, can be amazingly turned on.
Anton Diaz: Patti that is such a great point. You know in my experience when I have had a woman agree to kiss me and she’s on her way to kiss me and maybe one inch before her lips meet my lips she says, “You know what, I’ve changed my mind,” and I’ve been totally there with it and said perfect, she has jumped on me after that. Just to be with a woman at every single second.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Well we’re going to have to go here soon. I guess I have room for one more question for you though, so I’ll pull out my secret question. You talk about something and I just love it when you talk about this. It’s when you talk about your training with the great masters of Taoism and they go back to ancient times and talk about immortality. I was wondering if you could just share a little bit about how expanded orgasm relates to immortality. I love that story.
Anton Diaz: Oh, that’s a beautiful one. In a very quick note, people may not know but all the sexual cultivation practices were created in ancient China around 3000 BC by celibate monks. Isn’t that funny? Celibate monks.
Dr. Patti Taylor: That’s great. [laughs] I like that.
Anton Diaz: They very rarely engaged with women sexually . . .
Dr. Patti Taylor: Maybe if they weren’t celibate they would have populated and you know, they’d be around today, you know. But anyway, go ahead.
Anton Diaz: Oh, my god. But they learned how to activate their sexual energy through self pleasuring and how to channel that energy into really the original orgasmic energy that created them. And the concept is this: the concept that once they were able to tap into that original orgasmic energy that created them they were actually able to, in a sense, remember the very first cell before it divided into two, into four that created their body. And there’s actual theory now that Master Chia is doing now on stem cell research because when that division of cell happens, when the sperm meets the egg and we have this now cell that is ready to divide and create the body, there’s actually a portion of those cells that are set aside called stem cells. And these cells basically never evolve further; they’re kind of kept in reserve. The Taoist believe that these cells were kept in reserve so that when we had any injury to our body the body would refer to those specific cells for their DNA to repair that part of our body. And the Taoist masters were able to tap into those very cells when they meditated and thereby keep younger and keep all of their system as if they were still young because they were always copying their repairs from original cells rather than making copies from cells that just kept duplicating and getting older and getting drier and getting used. So the whole concept of Taoist cultivation practices was being able to tap with your sexual energy the original orgasmic energy that created you and by tapping into that energy you could live long enough to be enlightened in this lifetime.
Dr. Patti Taylor: Well I know that story; it’s certainly not unique to Master Chia. There are a lot of books, the Jade Dragon line certainly talks about that with the immortality very common in the whole Taoist . . .
Anton Diaz: Absolutely. That’s their basic thing.
Dr. Patti Taylor: . . .lineage that the sexual practices do bring immortality. And just speaking for myself all the people that I know that practice expanded orgasm are the youngest, juiciest and hottest people alive and you’re certainly living proof of that. Anyone who meets Anton will know you just absolutely shine. So, with that thank you so much for sharing with us today it’s been a blast.
You can find our more about Anton at www.sexyspirits.com. This has been Dr. Patti Taylor. You can write to me at [email protected] and I protect and print books of this show and other shows on Personal Life Media Network. Visit their website at www.personallifemedia.com. Thank you so much for listening. That’s all for now. I remain yours in ever expanded lovemaking and I’ll see you next week.
[music]