Episode 110: Sacred Shamanic Sex for Men (Part Two) with Steven Jay and Kypris Drake

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Dr. Stephen Jay and Kypris Drake, co-founders of yabyummy.com, return to share their techniques and insights on how to give a man a truly memorable lingam massage. Why is important that this massage be non-goal oriented? What issues must men and women overcome in order to enjoy this to its full potential? Why do men start receiving pleasure on their backs? Can men do this massage solo as well? What are some of the special strokes that you can use? Why do Stephen and Kypris recommend this massage as a standalone activity? What sorts of amazing outcomes follow when couples give each other these types of loving massages? What plans do Stephen and Kypris have for their own future for sharing with the world?

Transcript

Dr. Patti Taylor: Welcome to the Expanded Lovemaking show. I’m your host Dr. Patti Taylor of expandedlovemaking.com and I teach you how to meet exquisite love. This is part two of a two part series. Today we’re talking about sacred shamanic sex for men. I love doing shows about men. Gosh, how often men’s sexuality isn’t even discussed or explored. Why is this? Is it because men are just so happy for any kind of touch at all, they don’t want to rock the boat? So this show is both for the man and the women willing to navigate the boundaries of pleasure that a man is capable of experiencing. Pleasuring a man can be so much fun for both the giver and the receiver. Lets find out more. Welcoming back our guests Dr. Steven Jay and Kypris Drake. So hi and welcome back.

 

Kypris Drake: Hello.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Hi.

 

Kypris Drake: Nice to be here. Thank you.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm. Thank you for letting us share with you.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Oh, it’s my pleasure. We’ve been having a lot of fun, haven’t we?

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: We really have. We just finished show one and we’re back, so hopefully you have heard ‘cause we’ve talked all about shamanism and a whole lot of good stuff about women, but for those of you just jumping on board I’m going to give you the cliffnotes version of Kypris and Steven. Kypris Drake is the author of Journey to Sexual Wholeness: The Six Gateways to Tantric Sexuality. Dr. Steven Jay is a PhD physicist combining his knowledge of physics with Zen Buddhism and other spiritual practices. They both do a lot of tantra, coaching, healing and counseling in San Diego. So with this we’re going to just jump right in and talk about the men. And so why don’t we begin with… lets see, I did watch your downloadable video and it was a gorgeous experience of watching the lingum massage, and lingum is of course another name for penis, so… I’ll just ask you to start right away and tell us a little bit about why, why talk about men and what you think is so important about giving men a healing experience.

 

Kypris Drake: Wow! Well I could probably talk for hours about that, but…. I think, I mean the first thing I want to say is that the word lingum comes from the sanscrit, it means wand of light. And really for me what I am wanting to offer to a man during this sacred experience of massaging the penis and his whole body is an awakening of the penis to sort of be that wand of light, so almost imagining in your minds eye, those of you who are out there listening, imagine the penis as not just a means to an end; so not just a means towards, you know, having sex, having an ejaculation, but having the penis become something that’s both sexual and spiritual and very ecstatic and opening the whole body up to an experience of orgasm so that the experience of orgasm isn’t just localized in the penis, but we make the container bigger. We allow the whole body to hold sexual energy and sexual excitement so that when there’s an orgasm it encompasses all of you. And I think Dr. Steven Jay said in our last show, you know, the orgasms he used to have were like sneezes compared to, to what is happening now. And that’s just one of the side benefits of this sacred lingum massage.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Uh huh. What are some of the other side benefits?

 

Kypris Drake: You want to talk about those Steven?

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Sure. Side benefits. There’s really, I guess there’s side benefits. One of the things that the massage does is learns to, it teaches you or gives you the experience of having a more sensitive penis. So this, you know, it’s like the world we see when we learn to have sex and we see it on, well if you watch porn; it’s all this hard pounding, it’s about a real strong physical connection, and there’s nothing really wrong with that, it’s just that that’s really one very fine way that you can make love. But if you want to enjoy an entire range of lovemaking, it really helps to have your penis be this thing that’s just beautiful and sensitive to all touches and all energies. So one of the things that the massage does as a side benefit is that it sensitizes your penis so that, you know, you can experience this. Now for men out there who have the challenge of premature ejaculation may be going, “Whoa, I don’t want to have a sensitive penis. It’s too sensitive as it is.”

 

Kypris Drake: Right.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: And so the side benefits become, it’s amazing, they’re actually twofold. If you have the challenge of premature ejaculation, you move towards this ability to have fully body orgasms and multiple orgasms without ejaculating; so we call that ejaculation mastery. And it really works on both sides. So for the men that have trouble achieving an erection, you have this beautiful side benefit that in essence it doesn’t matter. So you learn to love the penis when it’s soft as much as when it’s hard, and when men are given that freedom all the sudden a lot of the guilt and shame around that state go away, and this is a pathway towards having, again, it’s just a mastery of the penis in itself. So being able to move through to an erection, being okay with that state and being okay with when you’re not erect and having it all be just yum.

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well I think that’s all really beautiful. Do you think women also have some issues around the penis, like they’re afraid of it?

 

Kypris Drake; Yeah, I think there might be all kinds of stuff for women depending on where we’re coming from sexually, depending on what our life’s experiences have been. And the lingum massage really is a great way for a woman to experience the penis and know that she’s safe…

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm.

 

Kypris Drake: it’s not coming at her, you know. And in fact, we reverse rolls, we reverse the traditional rolls in the lingum massage and the man becomes receptive, and his roll is to lie there and surrender.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm. And I can’t, there’s so many times where we’ve been, you know, doing this ritual for a couple and…

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: and it’s like the words coming out of the woman’s mouth are always, you know, just, like, “Oh my god, I didn’t know I could do that. I didn’t know I could touch that way. I’ve never been given myself permission to explore”. And there’s a lot of, you know, we talk about a lot of different techniques; they’re just, you know, things that you wouldn’t think would feel good that feel amazing…

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: that you just would never think to try.

 

Kypris Drake: Yeah.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Yeah, because a penis to a woman I think is always something that is going to enter her at any moment, right?

 

Kypris Drake: Yes, yes, exactly.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: So I’m getting that in the lingum massage, it’s, again, we talked about this in our show number one, that the massage is not goal oriented. I mean, again, this is not goal oriented either; you’re not giving the man a massage in order to get him hard so that he can enter the woman. You’re just…

 

Kypris Drake: Right.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: You’re just getting him, giving him a massage for his enjoyment and with no goal at the end.

 

Kypris Drake: Yeah, that’s, and that’s right. I mean, and really this is true in both the yoni massage and the lingum massage. For the yoni massage that we were talking about on our last show we recommend that you don’t have intercourse afterwards, that you allow the yoni to integrate. And it’s the same with the lingum massage; we really recommend that you allow the penis to integrate the experience, and for the woman who’s giving the lingum massage it’s a great opportunity for her to integrate the experience of being able to give in this loving and sexual way and having that be enough.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Uh huh, for both of the people…

 

Kypris Drake: Yeah, yeah.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: ‘Cause I love that decoupling, the giving with the getting or the goal, you know. ‘Cause I think that really creates so much space to see the genitals as, you know, way much, much more in present time.

 

Kypris Drake: And I think it leads us also to that experience of lovemaking never being the same twice that we were talking about in I think the last show, that diversity comes in because we learn to play…

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm.

 

Kypris Drake: in a way. I mean this is play. And so when we’re, when we’re giving a lingum massage, for me as a woman, it’s an opportunity for me to kind of experiment and in a very lving and connected way I’m, you know, moving my hands very slowly when we get to that part, and, you know, as with the yoni massage, we don’t start massaging the penis from the beginning; we start with a back massage and then we progress into a massage on the front of the body that’s very sensual and very sexual ‘cause men really like that energy to help them activate and it’s a healing experience for the whole body. And by the time I get to the penis, it’s like, it’s almost like an experiment. I mean, I’m a scientist also, and my backgrounds in biology. You know, we try different things to see what works and then we take notes and, you know… And so with, you know, what’s interesting about the lingum massage is it’s not like do the experiment one time and then you always know what works. You have to do the experiment every time because the penis changes. So in doing this practice with Stephen Jay, you know, when we first started it was a very different experience of giving him a lingum massage than it is now, because he’s different.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well we’re going to go into that in sections, after the break. But just before we take a break I wanted to quickly touch on the question of solo massage for men since I think it’s so much easier for men.

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm.

 

Kypris Drake: You want to talk about that Stephen?

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Yeah, absolutely. There’s nothing really that, that really needs to be shifted with this massage to go from being a partner massage to a solo massage.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: But maybe the back massage part.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: But what you do for the back massage is you do rubbing things for yourself, so that looks like maybe taking a bath…

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: to relax yourself ‘cause the back massage, intention of the back massage is to bring you into a relaxed state. So you shift it around it a little bit; you take a massage rather than that. And then when you come to working on your front – and we’ll talk about how to do this, you know, in the next section – but you can imagine, we have an exercise, a meditation actually, on a CD that we sell that invites the goddess into your body, so you almost imagine in a spiritual way that you’ve brought in the feminine and that she flows her hands, that as you start touching yourself you’re in a space of imaging that spirit’s actually touching you, and I know it kind of sounds whooey, but it’s really an ecstatic way to move into the moment of massaging yourself with love.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Okay, great. Well we will get into that after a break. This is Dr. Patti Taylor, and I am here with Dr. Stephen Jay and Kypris Drake, and you can learn more about them at their website, yabyummy.com. I’ll spell that, y-a-b-y-u-m-m-y, dot com. They do have lots of great stuff at their website, including downloadable videos that you can access from anywhere in the world, and including one on shamanic massage, the lingum massage for men. So lots of other good stuff too. So please stay with us. We’ll be right back.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: We’re back. So lets just hop right in and find out what we can do to have fabulous shamanic massage for men.

 

Kypris Drake: Well as we were talking about with the sacred yoni massage, really the first thing to do if you are working as a couple is to set aside the time, and even if you’re going to work with yourself solo, I think it’s very, very valuable to set aside time in your schedule because we’re all busy. And really what we want to do with this practice is drop into the moment, completely and totally and not be thinking about where is the next thing you have to rush off to or the grocery list or anything like that. You know, we also like to create a really beautiful space for this practice because it is a sacred practice, so as with any sacred type of ceremony that humans tend to do on the face of the earth, we tend to, you know, light candles or burn incense or some other, you know, smelling good thing and to scent the air, we tend to clean up the area so that it’s, you know, harmonious and beautiful, and from there flowing into a meditation and get anchored, you know. And that’s really the preparation, so there’s that, you know; making the time, creating the space, and just, and just anchoring yourself in meditation, and then coming in to connection with your partner, if you’re working with a partner, and, you know, connecting your energy to theirs by breathing together, looking into each other’s eyes, connecting your hearts. And then once we’ve done all that we’re ready to actually touch the man. And that builds a lot of anticipation, right Stephen?

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm, it does. It also, you know, as you said, it sets the stage to drop in. and I know I keep saying this but my, it’s like the entire process of being together and of doing these massages, the yoni massage and the tantric massage and the lingum massage that we’re talking about there, is about being in the moment. Just living this moment and not worrying about anything else, and I think it’s a really simple concept and we’re just really complicated people that have put lots of layers on top of that ability. So, you know, the practices that we teach, the meditations and the videos and all of this stuff is really about, it’s almost about unwinding all of the stuff that we’ve learned to layer on top of this concept that we’re just spirits in human bodies playing with other spirits in human bodies.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Mm, and it’s so nice when we can just drop into that other reality, isn’t it? ‘Cause it’s so much, it’s more profound and it’s inherently in all of us, isn’t it?

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm. Well and you know, the Shaman see it as this shamanic sacred sexuality that we’re practicing and the Shamans call this non ordinary reality, you know, it’s, or the invisible world or they have a lot of words for it, but it’s essentially another place, another perceptional place that you go to, and to be moving sexual energy while in that other state of consciousness is just, it’s another way to pray, it’s another way to connect to God and at the same time it feels really, really good.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: And I love that you’re teaching this because I think everyone, if they want to, can go there, and it doesn’t take hours and hours of, you know, beating drums and staying up all night and drinking things that taste terrible. I think, you know…. I think it takes dropping in and, you know, breathing and having the intention and, you know, lets continue, ‘cause I think we can do it. Lets find out how, you know.

 

Kypris Drake: Well with the sacred lingum massage, you know, there’s all that preparation, and then we flow into touch. And the way that we touch in a sensual lingum massage is very different from the way we might be accustomed to touching. I know for me as a woman that I would very often be focused on arousing my partner when I would touch, and the whole, you know, there was always this goal to get him aroused, to get him hard so we could have sex. And that was always how it was going to go. And so with the sacred lingum massage there’s a gift for the woman in that the woman can simply explore the man’s body, and that begins with the back massage, which is just a very relaxing connection. And yet at the same time I include a sexual connection in it, so I have, it’s sort of our, sort of, I don’t know, Yab Yummy technique here where I will put one hand, my left hand – ‘cause, I don’t know, it’s just the way I tend to work – I’ll put my one hand so that a fingertip is actually touching the perineum, which is the little space between the testicles and the anus which is very, very sensitive on most men, right… Stephen is acknowledging that. So one hand is there and creating an acknowledgment of that part of his body that is his sexual self. And then my other hand is going to be on the back of his heart, just establishing a connection with his heart and sending him love, so it’s this really unusual combination of combining the two at the same time.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: We also talk about different ways to touch, ‘cause once you have this freedom that you’re no longer, no longer have to be touched, that that evokes, you know, arousal, with this goal you can explore different ways to touch, and like everything, it helps to have these touches broken down. We teach what we call - you know, in our tantric massage especially in that video – but we talk about the elements of touch. So we break down the elements of earth, air, water and fire and we convert them into different ways to touch the body.

 

Kypris Drake: (Unintelligible). I was sort of, I got into this sort of dreamy palce where I was hearing him talk about that touch because it’s so phenomenal to approach touch from this angle of what kind of energy am I sharing with my partner? And that was something I never really thought about in that way before I started to create the six gateways and start really thinking about conscious, you know, sensuality and touching. And so we do these different practices now that add more diversity to the ways that we connect, so there’s an earth touch where my hand is just either very still or doing some touches that kind of feel like, you know, massage, like a kneeding kind of touch in the muscles and that’s very relaxing and helps the man to start to drop in and hopefully to let go a little bit of the “Okay, you know, when am I going to get my sacred hand job place”, you know, ‘cause men are focused on, you know, on that; if they know sex is going to happen they can get really focused on it. So we’re helping them kind of drop into this place that is less goal oriented. And then from there there’s like, there’s another touch we can use that connects really powerfully to the heart and to love, and in fact it’s, we call it the water touch, but you also find this touch in lomilomi massage, and in fact I learned it from Hawaiian elders who taught me about really touching from the heart, really using a loving touch to transmit, you know, this sort of relaxation to another person. And we also have a fire touch, which is less massage and more about arousing the body, but it’s more about moving energy through the body, so you’re using the fingernails very lightly and I was very surprised when I was learning lomilomi massage with the elders in Hawaii, but they also use this touch in a very non sexual way to move energy powerfully through the body, and I’m watching this 85 year old - she had, Steven was there with me – 85 year old, you know, Hawaiian women, you know, Kahuna elder master of the lomilomi massage, and she’s like, “Okay and then you do this and it moves the energy”, and I’m like, “Wow, yeah, that’s what we’re doing, that touch.” And so it was really great example to me of how these practices are found all over the world and they sort of channel intuitively into us from spirit…

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Specifically the air touch.

 

Kypris Drake: Oh, sorry. Got a little side tracked there; fire touch is really fun. Fire touch is really the most arousing, but then the air touch is also a very sexual, but it’s that, you know, touching so lightly that you’re just barely touching the hairs on the body and doing it very, very slowly with all of these touches. Doing them more slowly than we actually are breathing, so that we can really stay present.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Wow, that sounds really hot. Well we’re going to have to take another break, and then we’ll flip them over so everybody…

 

Kypris Drake: Okay.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: come back and find out about that. This is Dr. Patti Taylor, and I’m here with Dr. Steven Jay and Kypris Drake. You can learn more about Steven and Kypris at their website, yabyummy.com, y-a-b-y-u-m-m-y, dot com. Please stay with us.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: We’re back and we’re talking about sacred shamanic massage for men. And lets flip the guy over and what happens next?

 

Kypris Drake: Well we were just talking about the different kinds of touches. And we continue to use those different kinds of touches throughout the massage. But the difference is when the man flips over on his back, well, you know, for most men – not all men – but for a lot of men if they’ve been getting all this yummy touch on their back by the time they flip over they’re already very aroused.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm.

 

Kypris Drake: And so there’s this desire I think for a lot of men, and maybe Steven can speak to this, to “Okay, lets jump start this. Where are we going next?”

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm. Yes, the thought is, you know, “I want to have… Well, I mean, I want to have my penis touched. I’m pretty aroused; I want to be touched there.” And I geuss what’s beautiful about this massage is that, you know, that’s honored and the part that most men might not know is that if you can connect that part of your body, if you can connect your penis to your whole body, then you start to open up this channel of having orgasms in your whole body. So what Kypris is going to talk about then is how she starts by touching the penis, but not necessarily by going into a full, what we call a lingum massage part where you’re actually stroking on the penis, but just exploring it as if it’s part of the whole body.

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm. Yes, so I’ll have one hand, you know, remember we talked with the back massage, I have one hand on the perineum or Steven likes to call that spot the tweeny, the place between the testicles and the anus. I flip the man over, then I’ll put a hand over the lingum and I’ll just cup the lingum there with my hand. And then I’ll start to work with Steven and to move the energy around in his body, and a lot of what I’ll be doing is there’s a lot of energy alright in the lingum, you know - and there’s signs of arousal that we can see for men, so it’s a little bit easier than working on women – then we can move that energy of arousal up through his body. So when we first started to do this practice together, I would be working with doing this and Steven, I was, you know, coaching him in breathing because that’s a really big thing that the man is doing when he’s receiving this massage is breathing to really stay present. Yeah, big breaths. And he would say to me, he’d get really angry and he’d say, “I can’t keep an erection if I’m breathing.” And, you know, that’s great because the point is not to have an erection, and in fact when a man starts to learn mastery of this energy then he can make his erection come and go at will. And so this lingum massage is sort of the first taste of learning that practice. So what I’ll be doing with a man who is, you know, Steven’s in a very erect is I’ll be moving that energy up his body, and if he’s more relaxed and not aroused, then I might move the energy the other direction, I might move it down from his heart toward his lingum to concentrate the energy there and bring more arousal and just playing with the arousal around the body…

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm.

 

Kypris Drake: you know…

 

Dr. Steven Jay: And the man learns to then - almost by examples, if you’re with someone who can show you how to do that, or if you’re with someone who’s following with us showing them how to do it – the man learns to use his breaths to do that within himself, and that becomes the mastery.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well that sounds very interesting. So what I’m wondering is that for men that, for example, have a premature ejaculation – I don’t know if you can ejaculate prematurely – but for men who have that as what they think is their issue, that they’d like to prolong their ejaculation, they might find ways to use breaths to help them, you know, get more of what they want, and for men that have, lets say, other issues, they can just find ways to use their breath to get more of what they’re, they want, more of a relationship with their erection basically…

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm. Yeah, very….

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Using their breaths, is that true?

 

Kypris Drake: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. It’s breath and visualization in the way that I teach my students with this practice. So if, you know, I sort of see what men might label as premature ejaculation and what men might label as erectile dysfunction, sort of this two ends of the spectrum where premature ejaculation is a lot of energy that’s concentrated in the penis that can’t figure out how to move to other places in the body. And erectile dysfunction often is a lack of energy in the penis and if, you know, you sense in as I do as a healer, I can sense into the body and I can find “Oh, well here’s you sexual energy, it’s up here in your heart” or “It’s up here in your head” or “It’s down here in your feet. Lets move it into your lingum.” And very often that is, that’s the practice that helps. So with a lingum massage, the man can start to sense into that for himself, because he can feel with the touch and the arousal, he can start to get a lot more body awareness. You know, a lot of men tend to keep a lot of their awareness in their head, and…

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Right.

 

Kypris Drake: you know, and so, and so when we bring them really powerfully into the body, then they start to notice. Right?

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm. That leads into that sensitivity and all of the things that we talked about at the beginning of the show.

 

Kypris Drake: I mean Steven, I remember when I started to work with you, there was a, there was a block in your stomach. Do you want to maybe share about that?

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Yeah, the feeling was always that, you know, I had lots of, I was always on the side of lots of energy in my penis, and it almost feels like I had a really small container so that no matter what, even if I just put a drop of sexual charge in there it would feel really full, so that the practice was moving the energy. And Kypris would try to move the energy up through my belly and I would feel what I call the block – and some people may experience this as they do just healing in general. So it feels as if it’s kind of, you know, the energy you want to feel, the same sexual charge in your whole body, you want to move what we call the kundalini energy up through the body, and it would hit my stomach and it would feel kind of numb and dull as if there was kind of this big rock in there that I couldn’t move around. So as Kypris worked on me over the years, that went away and what happened and with my experience with a lot of this work is that I never know when it changes, I just know that its changed. So I look back and say, “Wow, I haven’t felt that in, well I don’t even remember the last time I felt that”, but I don’t know the moment that it actually went away, and I find that with spiritual growth, that’s often the case for me.

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well that’s interesting. And what kind of a visualization might you use, just as one example?

 

Dr. Steven Jay: I, you know, I use a lot of different visualization, depending upon what I’m doing. But when I’m moving the energy up it often feels like, it’s almost like honey flowing around my body or if the energy’s coming down I often feel like I’m in a waterfall, you know, of just being poured on and I’m sort of naked and it’s flowing all around me. It can feel like heat; some people don’t even visualize sometimes, it’s more of a sensation or a smell. So whatever sense you’re really strong with, that’s what I would recommend you use, tune in to.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Uh huh. And Kypris how about you?

 

Kypris Drake: Well, with these sort of blocks in the body it’s an interesting thing to sense from the side of having it in my body. What I usually experience is tension or pain or tightness. So for many years I’ve been working with my heart and with opening my heart because that’s the seed of the woman’s sexual energy and I really want to have that place be open. And what I would experience a lot would be a pain in my heart, you know, almost as if there were something medical going on there. But I noticed that with that pain if I would breathe and I would consciously think about moving it, that I could sort of chip away at it. And as Steven said, it’s not an instantaneous process for most of us. For most of us it’s a process that takes place over time. So there are these very slow gentle practices where I breathe and for me I like to bring the kundalini into my body, so that’s that sexual energy, that life force energy, and I like to breathe it up from the earth and up through my spinal column and into each of my individual energy centers, and the hardest one of the energy centers. And so what I would do is I would, when I would get to the hardest I would imagine this energy sort of swirling around there and sort of clearing out of what kind of, I would see pictures in my mind of like these sort of black chunks of coal or something that needed to come out. And so I would sort of do this visualization of this life force energy sort of melting those things so they could kind of return to the earth and be compost and I’d breathe that energy up into my heart and then breathe the trash out, so to speak, breathe it out down through my spine and let it go into the earth and let it be composted there. And that’s a very powerful practice; in fact, that’s a practice that’s in my book, it’s called Dragon Breaths, and it’s an intentional practice of clearing out the energy body.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Wow! Well listen, I know you guys work with lots and lots of clients and you have a lot of stuff going on in Southern California and people can go to your website, yabyummy.com and find out about all kinds of events and programs, you’re very, have a very, very active website with all kinds of things. So just one quick question: where do you, what is your vision, your goal for yourselves, you know, for, you know, the world and your work?

 

Kypris Drake: Well for me, my vision is that everyone around the world would at least know about this work and have access to it. And for myself personally, to just be able to be of service in supporting that happening.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm.

 

Kypris Drake: Yeah. That’s really, that’s really my vision for myself, and I, about four years ago gave up my mainstream life to dedicate myself to this work because I really believe in it and in the powerful transformation that it creates.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Uh huh. And have you seen lots of peopel transform out of this?

 

Kypris Drake: Oh yeah. Yeah, including myself.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Uh huh.

 

Kypris Drake: Including myself. I mean the changes in how I relate to other people, particularly men, are profound, and the changes in how I experience my sexuality are profound. And my whole life has really transformed.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Uh huh.

 

Kypris Drake: Yeah, very, very powerful stuff, you know.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Yes, and I’m sure you work, you see many of your clients go through profound changes as well.

 

Kypris Drake: Absolutely. I was working with a student just yesterday who has had profound shift in her ability to set boundaries with men in her life. And she described, you know, being able to stop a situation where a man was wanting to share a lot of anger with her about something that he thought she had done. And she shared with me that, you know, she says, “I just had this profound beautiful sense that I didn’t have to, to be on the receiving end of that anymore.” And so to really watch her come into her power was amazing.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Uh huh.

 

Kypris Drake: Yeah.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, one person at a time, huh?

 

Kypris Drake: Exactly.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Mm hmm.

 

Kypris Drake: Exactly.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: And how about you Steven? Your vision for the world and why, what motivates you to keep doing this and where do you see your work going?

 

Dr. Steven Jay: I mean, the work, Kypris and I are really creating a singular vision with Yab Yummy. But when I, when I wake up in the morning, you know, and I do my morning meditation, you know, the thing I always ask for is “How can I give service?” I mean it’s really just that simple; “What do you want me to do to be of service to the world today?” And that brings me more ease and joy than anything that I can imagine asking for. So, you know, as Kypris said, it’s to touch as many people as we possibly can, and when we have our visioning about where we want to be, you know, in the future, it’s always about how can we get this information out…

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: You know, how can we reach people, how can we reach couples. And, you know – you know, how can we reach singles – and there’s different people learn in different ways, which is one of the reasons that we, you know, we have the videos for couple that wouldn’t feel comfortable coming to our events, we have the events for people that like group energy, that learn best in a teaching modality that way. and then we have our private work, you know, when people just really want to focus down and, you know, do that and we can do that over the phone, so we, you know, we do, I do session, I have, you know, students all over the world, Kypris has students all over the world. It’s really, it’s really wonderful. It’s just we need to clone ourselves, so we can get this out to more people.

 

Kypris Drake: Mm hmm.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: You work very, very hard; it really, really, really shows. So we’re going to close this show, and I’d like to invite both of you to leave us one parting thought to inspire us in our day, although you’ve certainly inspired us already. How about Steven we’ll start with you?

 

Dr. Steven Jay: Often when I, when I want to not speak for myself and my ego and just hear what spirit wants to say, I’ll just take a breath (deep breathing). And I think the inspiring thought would be maybe just to share that, have people just take a breath right now, have the whole, everyone listening take a breath (deep breathing). And just breathe into how much more even that one little simple practice, how much more bliss that can bring to the whole world.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Beautiful. And Kypris?

 

Kypris Drake: I think for me, my practice lately has been to cultivate the feeling of sunlight in my heart, and I’d like to encourage everyone to allow themselves to reach for a feeling of feeling good everyday. So wherever you are in your life, whatever’s happening in your life, to find a way to reach for a feeling, a memory of something that’s happened, if you’re in a place of not feeling good and come back to that memory of feeling good and anchor that in you because that’s what really creates powerful change.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well that’s beautiful; sunlight every single day. Well thank you so much. We’ve been talking with Dr. Steven Jay and Kypris Drake of yabyummy.com, y-a-b-y-u-m-m-y, dot com. Thank you so much for coming on the show.

 

Kypris Drake: Thank you for having us.

 

Dr. Steven Jay: You’re so welcome.

 

Dr. Patti Taylor: Thank you, thank you, thank you. Please send me, Patti, email at [email protected]. For text and transcripts of this show and other shows, please visit our website at personallifemedia.com. Also please visit me at expanedlovemaking.com. Or on Face Book at Expanded Orgasm. This is Dr. Patti Taylor. That’s all for now. I remain yours in ever expanded lovemaking, and I’ll see you next week.