Episode 61: Love Beyond All Words: A Powerful Path for Men and Women (Part One) with Bernie Prior

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Have you ever wondered how to take your love life to the next level? Or, how to get your love life out of a seemingly endless loop of confusion, anger, and mystery? Well, the answers may lie in pure, Tantric teachings. Listen as Dr. Patti interviews Bernie Prior, a realized Tantric master, who gives an illuminating perspective on the nature of men, women, lovemaking, consciousness, and more. Find out why we are so much more than just men and women, and what it really means to embody the masculine and feminine principles. Find out why “trauma and drama” have such great value that propel us forward in our growth, and take us to this very moment of presence! Learn why going beyond the ego-mind of consciousness will pave the way to deeper love, and what this deeper love is like. Find out what you have to do, and “be”, in order to experience the profound states of consciousness that occur when embodying the pure masculine, and feminine - as well as the combined state of unity. Learn what lovemaking from this state is like as well! Are these states available to you? Learn how they are, and what you can do on a practical level to live in this place of love on a day to day basis. A deeply inspiring show that is sure to open your heart to new ways of living, and loving so much more!

Transcript

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Welcome to the Expanded Lovemaking show!  I'm your host, Dr. Patti Taylor of expandedlovemaking.com, and I teach you how to make exquisite love.  This is part one of a two-part show.  Today on the show, we are talking about love beyond all words. A powerful path for men and women.  Do you feel confused, bogged down, or bored with your beloved?  Or are you wondering how you can take your already juicy love into even better territory?  Today, we'll be getting illumination and inspiration on questions like these from a true Tantric master.  We are so lucky to have as our special guest, Bernie Prior, here on tour from New Zealand.

Bernie Prior:  Men and women are the embodiments of another place entirely, a place of depth and universal intelligence and love and light.  So, men and women are the instruments of another place entirely. 

Bernie Prior:  We're already one but in two different poles, because we have to have that polarity, because otherwise there would be no attraction.  There would be nothing to attract us, if we were not opposites. 

Bernie Prior:  What he's loving and attracted to in a woman, is that great luscious power and light and radiance that she is.  He's no longer seeing her as just an ordinary woman that he wants sex with, not even great sex.  He's drawn to her power.  He's drawn to her mystery. 

Bernie Prior:  What most people do is, through the survival mechanism, just become sexual robots.  So we're just, the survival mechanism takes over and all that we basically want is hot sex. 

Bernie Prior:  What's your address?  Where are you living from?  Are you living out of your egoic address?  Or are you living out of your deepest unknown source? 

Bernie Prior:  You're beginning to function out of something you've never functioned out of before.  I call it knowingness, and that's your eternal essence.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Welcome, Bernie.

Bernie Prior: Hi Patti, thank you for inviting me.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Well, it's just such a pleasure.  So let me tell you a little bit about Bernie.  Going through a series of ever-deepening realizations from the age of 19, Bernie Prior has opened up into the pure nature of himself and humanity.  Pure consciousness.  He's been inspired to share his realizations and has given talks globally to those who seek peace, freedom, love, and truth.  So let's talk with Bernie about the really deep stuff, and how it impacts our practical concerns.  How can men and women strip away the outer trappings to go so much deeper into an experience that is simply beyond words?  We'll inquire into whether we can find miraculous new levels of love, intimacy, and truth in both new relationships and old.  So let's get started.  Men and women: what happens?

Bernie Prior:  Well, what happens is, men and women are so much more than just men and women.  Men and women are the embodiments of another place entirely, a place of depth and universal intelligence and love and light.  So, men and women are the instruments of another place entirely.  So, you know how difficult that is to hear, but that's what it is, it's that there's a power beyond us both that is who we are in a deeper place, and men and women – in a deeper place, man is much more than just a man: he is the masculine principle of the universe.  And woman is much more than just what you see as woman on the street, she is the feminine principle of the universe.  So there is cosmic powers behind men and women, and that's their true state of being.  And their attraction as men and women, as human beings, is to bring out that depth, that ongoing eternal essence of great love and great creativity, and great passion.  In that way they attract themselves to each other, in a way their attraction draws to them deeper and deeper potentials of who they are, but they must manifest them.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  So, I guess the age old question then becomes: if what you're saying is true, then why is it so hard for men and women to get along?

Bernie Prior: Well, first off, it's only hard because they have to come to a place to recognize who they truly are in the deep.  And who they truly are in the deep, they have to begin to learn to function from there.  So, men and women, so far, think they're two separate entities.  But they're two halves of one whole.  So actually men and women are already one, but they're one in a much deeper place.  Here our minds separate us as she's over there, and he's over there – he's over there, he's on the other side.  But really if you look at one of the most ancient symbols of Tantra, in terms of the East, which is the yin-yang symbol, you'll see both polarities, the masculine and the feminine, are absolutely intertwined.   They're held in the same circle.  That same circle is the depths of our true self.  So men and women in the deepest place are already one.  But they think that they're separate simply because of the polarity.  We're poles apart, because we're two different poles of the one.  So one is dynamic, yeah?  So there's that dynamic principle of expression, and the other one is – in the deepest place – you could say, profoundly static or still.  So there's the mind that's  perceiving all this, or the consciousness that's perceiving all this, that's the principle of the masculine, of pure consciousness – and then there's this dynamic energy, light, and power of what feminine is.  So when you put those two together, in a human body, well, you've got a bit of drama going on until you get this message, you know, there seems to be a lot of drama that's going on.  But the drama is what we have to awaken beyond.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  So what is it, then, that causes the drama?

Bernie Prior:  Well, without the drama – [laughs].  Well just recently I've been calling this “the drama of man and woman.”  It's the dharma of man and woman.  So the drama, everything that's going on, is really held in a profound teaching as long as you see this.  So the dharma is that: see beyond the drama, in the moment, see beyond it, see that our inherent nature is one.  We're already one, but in two different poles, because we have to have that polarity, because otherwise there would be no attraction.  There would be nothing to attract us if we were not opposites.  But we're opposites in the oneness, the pure primal state of authentic love.  So then, there's this fire that goes on.  The drama is the friction that would cause us, hopefully, to look into a deeper place.  No longer projective and protective, on the outside, but the drama eventually, when you've had enough of the drama you begin to look in.  And as you begin to look in, as men and women we become aware of a deeper sense of presence, power, and stillness – but a stillness that opens up and is just, is ragingly coming out into the passion for life.  But new life.  So the drama, eventually, if you're wise at least, will start to cause enough friction for you to look in another place.  Instead of trying to find your love outside, to find it inside.  And in the finding it inside, as women we find our inherent nature as the true feminine polarity of the universe.  As we men look inside we find the polarity of our true masculine energy of the universe, and we meet inside of that place.  Now that's entirely different.  Because at that place it's already one, so it's beyond the body, it's pure consciousness, is already one, it's ecstatic.  It's alive.  It's brand new.  It knows of no past. It's just exactly what it is, radiant aliveness, passion and power, creating the universe new every moment.  So when that gets into a relationship, which it can, then you've got something that is ecstatic, creative, illuming, freeing, and it begins to create this universe of form that hasn't been here before as men and women, it's an entirely different kind of partnership.  And what will come out of that is an entirely different touch.  The touch that will happen, that touch will come from another, more profound, deeper place.  So it won't have anything in it of an agenda.  It will have purity in it.  It will have ignition of what we are in it.  It will spark off an entirely new relationship, to each other and to the universe.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  So, if I hear you correctly, once I get tired of complaining about myself and my boyfriend, and screaming and moaning and yelling, I'm going to start inquiring about who I am as a woman and who my partner is as a man – I'm going to start looking in a whole new direction.  And I'm going to start asking you, what do you mean by this touch?  And how can I be touched by something a  lot deeper and more blissful?

Bernie Prior:  Yeah, it's kind of like that, hopefully that's how it turns out.  I mean people can go through that kind of ongoing chaos, it can take a hell of a long time before somebody gets the message: look in, stop trying to find your love outside – the love you're looking for is inside, and in your innermost reflections the beloved, and in your innermost reflection is your other half, is the male principle, the female principle, and then when you look out through the senses, in your attraction to a man or woman, my God, you can actually see it embodied in front of you.  At least, the potential for it to be embodied in front of you.  So yeah, when you've had enough of the pain and drama, hopefully you're going to look in.  So, at this stage, it could be that you start to cull a different kind of man, a different kind of relationship.  And what I've been saying to people for quite some while now is you have to throw away that shopping list, that he must look like this and have these, and must say this, do this, blahblahblah, all that stuff.  We have shopping lists and men and women want to attract to ourselves.  You either throw it away or you do this: the shopping list you created for this perfect man and this perfect woman, before you're looking for that outside, you be that that you require.  You be it.  Do you understand what I'm saying?  So everything that you want in a man, in a woman, well you live that.  Because then you're in real attraction.  So if you can live it, you'll draw it to you.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  So I want to go back to something – I love that, but I want to go back to being touched.  What would it feel like to really be touched in this new paradigm?

Bernie Prior:  Well, in true Tantra we always have to look beyond what appears to be in our current perception and in our senses.  So in the deep of what we are, those primal forces of the masculine and feminine are completely selfless.  There's no one there, there's no name there, there's no identity there as a someone.  They're universal principles and always there the great feminine, the great masculine, do you see how awesome that is?  I mean you can't know them as something that is static, they're just moving continuously, in self-illumination.  You see, the mind can't go there, the conditional mind can't go there.  So that profound place, when that touches you through a man – so let's say a man is extremely present, he's learned that to live with his ego – to get what he wants from a woman, to get sex, to just have a body for himself, not only doesn't fulfill her, she feels cheated.  It doesn't fulfill him.  It doesn't open him beyond his limitation, it doesn't open her beyond her limitation.  To open a woman as a man to the depths that she is, you have to have something that's pre-existent.  Now what's pre-existent is presence.  So when a man is present, a woman feels the field of his attention, the field of his awareness.  That's something profoundly deep.  That's how she came into being.  She, woman, came from nowhere into everywhere.  She, woman, came from this emptiness and it was emptiness that touched her.  And that single touch of emptiness or innocence sprang her into life.  Suddenly she – ignited  as the entire light, power, and energy of the universe – came into creation.  So what I'm talking about here is that amazing power that is inherent in any man and any woman.  When a man becomes profoundly present – so he doesn't have an agenda towards a woman, what he's going to do to her, what he's not going to do and what he wants and what he doesn't want, there's no agenda.  When he comes from this place of presence, he literally is the universal man.  He literally is that that the universe that's beyond the universe, that great power of wisdom, that great presence of truth – he's that.  It's profound consciousness.  So when a woman gets in that kind of presence, she just opens naturally.  And she can trust that she can open beyond her wounds, she can trust that she can open beyond her pain, she can trust that she can open beyond her heartbreaks because what she's trusting is not the man as a body/mind identity.  She's trusting the power that real man is beyond all this.  The man, the profound principle that she is authentically displaying herself to as the entire universe.  I don't know whether you're understanding what I'm saying.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Oh, quite the opposite.

Bernie Prior:  Yeah, it's – and that's kind of displayed in the attraction, that when a man is so authentic, what he's loving and attracted to in a woman is that great luscious power and light and radiance that she is.  He's no longer seeing her as just an ordinary woman that he wants sex with, not even great sex.  He's drawn to her power.  He's drawn to her mystery.  He's drawn to her fragrance he's never tasted before, and he's willing to pay the price of his ego – in other words, I want this so much I'll let go every agenda in me just to be able to touch her in a deepest place, because I love that when I touch her from that place of authenticity, she opens and shows me the great mysteries of the universal feminine, pouring out her breasts and pouring out of her body, pouring out of every cell, she just unites me with that great love.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  [breathless laugh]  Wow.  I'm guessing this is that point when you're sharing this that everybody's head in the room is just nodding enthusiastically.

Bernie Prior:  There's a recognition.  This is hardly ever spoken of because we're at particular stage of human development and particular stage of the attraction of men and women.  We're at that stage where we're endeavoring – most of this is unconscious at the moment for most people – but we're endeavoring to go beyond that survival mechanism of the animal body, because I don't know if you've noticed but we're wearing an animal body, and there's a survival mechanism in it so that the male and the female in the animal body, they're not interested in great love, they're just interested in creating more forms, creating more animals, you know, keeping the species going, that's all they're – there's no love in that, you know.  They don't have the reflective capacity to know that, only we do as the consciousness of the masculine and feminine.  We have the capacity to awaken the animal body that we now are calling human to a greater power, the creative source itself, the creative source is the feminine, the creative source is the masculine.  So we've come to a point in our evolution as human beings within the attraction of men and women, that what we're really facing is still the old use of the survival mechanism to get what we want.  And it's gotten into our ego and it's gotten into our attraction and basically we just – absolute get what we can and protect and don't lose anything mode.  And yet we're abundant beings that don't need to get anything and cannot lose anything.  All that we can discover individually and collectively and in the attraction is great power, great light, great bliss, great ecstasy, great love.  Through our attraction and it's in ourselves.  But then we have to go beyond that survival mechanism.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Okay, well we're going to stop and take a quick break, and come back and find out more.  So this is Dr. Patti Taylor and I'm with Bernie Prior and we'll be right back.  You can learn more about Bernie Prior at www.bernieprior.org.  So please stay with us.

[Sponsor break]

Dr. Patti Taylor:  We're back!  And we were just talking about what happens when men and women go beyond their survival instinct and start making connections and going into attraction and we've got pure feminine and that pure masculine.  Is that something that they have to consciously do or practice, or is it more a matter of being?

Bernie Prior:  It's both.  To be this, initially, because being is being this, so to be this is the constant practice of being absolutely aware.  Absolutely conscious.  What most people do is, through the survival mechanism, they just become sexual robots.  So we're just – this survival mechanism takes over and all that we basically want is hot sex.  All that we actually want is to try and get something, get some kind of orgasm, some kind of relief.  And that relief isn't anything to do with the men and the women, it's the relief from the unconscious knowing that you and I as men and women are responsible for creating the universe.  So we want relief because that's just too much for us.  I don't know if you're getting this, but it's just too much.  It's just too much for a man to come to a woman and, before he's ready for this, and be so responsible  for how he touches her, how he speaks to her, how he engages her, from a greater awareness of what this is, this attraction, a greater awareness of who she is and what she represents, who he is and what he represents.  That takes a great responsibility.  So then, if we're not prepared to take that kind of responsibility, we use orgasm, we use sex just to have a relief.  An egoic relief from taking responsibility for that because it will mean we'll have to be at the cutting edge of evolution.  The cutting edge of being so absolutely aware, we would have to be responsible for every action of our mental, emotional, physical bodies.  Do you see that responsibility?  That's a hell of a lot to ask and that's a particular stage of development of a human being and within the attraction.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  I do, and yet I can also see making love and also being that responsible and having it be an incredible turn-on.  And interestingly enough, I can see that in making that kind of love, it 's not at all about technique, which you normally think of Tantra and, you know, the breathing and the eyegazing and learn this and learn that, but in this kind of making love it really would be about the presence, wouldn't it?

Bernie Prior:  It would be about the presence, the undoing of all the patterning – trying to get something from each other.  It would be so present that you would actually begin to be aware of a profound love already being made, as the universal being in the depths of what you are as men and women.  You know, this is an entirely different thing, then, what it would do, it would come up in you as a man, up in you as a woman, and it would take the both of you over.  And that's what we don't want, we don't want to be taken over.  It's like we don't want to, we want to egoically control our lives, egoically control what we experience with each other, but true Tantra is not that.  True Tantra is when you are selflessly letting go of control.  It's not that you become... when I say letting go of control, I'm saying letting go of control by giving yourself back to awareness, giving yourself back to presence.  Giving yourself back to true purpose of what you're together for.  You're not together to experience more egoic attraction, which will cause more pain and more wounds.  You're actually together to take each other into a deeper place of what it means to be a man, what it means to be a woman, what it means to be in the universe.  So you're taking each other, and inviting each other into a place you've never been in before.  Into another place of unity.  A deeper, deeper place.  And how would that look?  What would that feel like?  Let that take over your love life.  See what happens when that happens.  It's profound.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  So it's still the question of, on the one hand you're being very responsible in terms of being very present, but you're also being very surrendered as both the man and the woman?

Bernie Prior:  You're being surrendered in that both man and woman is letting go of any energy that wants to get anything out of this.  You're letting go to the energy that wants to give everything to this, in the way of the feminine, in the way of the masculine.  And you have to see what that looks like, because we're talking about going into new territory, here.  We're talking about going into that part of man and woman that is not actually being birthed by any human being.  So most people in their attraction are still going around on this egoic loop of needing to get something, and when they don't get what they want they get upset, they get angry, the old wounds come up.  Well what's I'm speaking of here is the transcending of all that with intelligence, with knowing what you're doing.  So there has to be a purpose of what you're together for, there has to be a meaning for what you're together for.  It's a commitment to great love, a commitment to deeper understanding and real truth inside the relationship.  And so then, when you've got that kind of bond happening, you're no longer looking at what you get through your past pains, through your future needs.  You're looking through what really is here already, but it's hidden with all the drama.  So you've got to see that you're not a victim.  He didn't cause you pain in this place, she didn't cause you pain in this place.  You're looking into this place where masculine and feminine have no knowledge of pain.  They only have the knowing and the direct experience of ecstasy.  So to come to this in Tantra, really means that it's not just about your lovemaking, what you're doing in the bedroom, what you're doing in your sexuality.  It's about how you function in the world of forms with all beings.  That's what Tantra is.  It's about you being as loving, you being as caring, you being as opened and surrendered and giving to all beings and all manners.  What that does, it begins to bring your intelligence, bring your awareness, into a holistic place as the masculine and feminine. And then when you get together with your partner, because you've been living in that deeper place in your daily lives and it's blessing all beings, then when you come to make love you don't have to try and find that, it's already here because you've been functioning in that all day.  So then, there's the real opportunity to embrace something that begins to arise in your consciousness, arise in your seeing each other, that just moves you into that place of ecstasy, moves you into that place of depth and profound loving.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  I really like what you're saying.  I've been out on a practice recently of watching the language that I use.  You know, when someone cuts me off in traffic, for example, quit using four-letter words.  For example, sending them love, and, you know, under the theory that it's hurting me more than it's hurting the person in the car that is never going to meet me, and I want my day to be beautiful.  And so I'm, you know, in a practice now of sort of sending out love wherever I go and replacing, you know, sort of an upgrade in my thoughts.  And what you're saying is that would actually translate into better lovemaking – and everywhere in my life.

Bernie Prior:  Yeah, I'm speaking that the truth is all, is love already.  To discover that means to completely and absolutely surrender on the deepest level who you ever thought you were, as a woman or as a man.  So we cannot make real love while we're still holding on to this egoic identity.  The profoundity of what the masculine is and what the feminine is doesn't have a particular identity.  Their identity is vast and open and yet they're appearing here as ordinary men and women, so to be in this kind of ecstatic place of loving, and to be in this ecstatic free place of giving, is to let go of the one who thinks they're doing this, the one who thinks they're a victim, the one who thinks they've got something to achieve here.  You've got let go of all that identity so, well, I've been using the phrase, I say, what's your address?  Where are you living from?  Are you living out of your egoic address?  Or are you living out of your deepest unknown source?  You're living – you're beginning to function out of something you've never functioned out of before.  I call it knowingness, and that's your eternal essence.  And so as you function out of that knowingness, even though you don't know what you know, it begins to manifest as your actions in life, and you go, that's what I know.  Because now it's right here in front of you.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  So that's a really important point, and I thank you for that.  So, rather than me thinking that I'm being beneficent, something to do that, why don't I maybe drop into my loving nature

Bernie Prior:  Don't just do it, be that.  So, be the meaning of life.  Be the love of life.  Be the ecstatic – the ecstasy of life.  Don't do it, be it.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  That's very beautiful.  Thank you.  Anyway, we're going to take a short break again, and afterwards, as if I'm not enough of an example, nevermind putting myself up for examination, but we're actually going to take another example.  So please stay with us, we are talking to Bernie Prior, this is Dr. Patti Taylor, and you can actually find out more about Bernie Prior, he has a great website, he travels all over the world, he has amazing programs, lots of CDs, and you can learn way more about him, he has DVDs too, so, you want to check out his website, it's bernieprior.org.  So please stay with us, we'll be right back.

[Sponsor break]

Dr. Patti Taylor:  We're back, and we're talking to Bernie Prior.  And real life example, how many people here are looking for their soul partner?  So Bernie, what do you have to say about that?

Bernie Prior:  Well, in attraction, we want the perfect, as it were, man or woman, to come into our life that we can really meet, that will really fulfill what this attraction is about. Of course, there's lots of hidden agendas in there because we have a particular direction for our selves.  Yeah?  So the direction is relative to our wounds, relative to avoiding those wounds, so we're looking for people who will not face us with our ambiguity.  Will not face us with our wounds.  Okay?  So we contrive some kind of soul partner that would really just give us everything that we want, but at the same time, not make us responsible for who we really are.  Now what you call a soul partner, and I'm not suggesting that a soul partner is a particular man or woman, a soul partner is really a man or a woman that's at a particular stage of development and is about to take a huge leap into another place.  That's your soul partner.  So then when you're looking for a soul partner, you have to understand what you're calling.  You're calling a power beyond the known into your life.  You're calling – you have to know what it is you're calling absolute change.  You're calling all your agendas to be faced.  You're calling everything that you think you're not calling, you're actually calling it. You're actually calling to bring some along that will bust you.  [laughs]  Bust your victimization, bust your limitation, bust your lack of knowing of love and being that love.  You're calling a ghostbuster.  Yeah?  So, a soul partner is someone that actually comes along and challenges you to be more than you currently are.  To be more of what you are as the feminine, more of what you are as the masculine, and of course more of what you are as a human being, because that's the whole point of Tantra.  The whole point is to embody what you are in a transcendental place of pure love and pure consciousness, but be the actions of it here.  So, calling the soul partner, be aware of what you're calling, you're calling the unknown.  You're calling to be busted, to be transformed, and to transknit the finer wonder and beauty of what you are to all beings.  Because you've called that to you.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  So, if you're experiencing some ego-suffering in the process with your partner that may be the trauma and drama that you were talking about earlier that maybe just what you need to bring you to that deeper level.

Bernie Prior:  Yeah, you – to me, the drama, when seen from a perspective of true Tantra, which is always, by the way, the transcendental coming into the actual, that's what Tantra is.  Tantra is the transcendental nature of pure consciousness as the masculine and feminine coming into the sense realm.  So when it comes into the sense realm, that's transcendental into the actual.  So we're actually that.  Now that's why in Tantra, and as you can see in existence, existence which is Tantra, is always changing.  Why is it always changing?  Well because the highest frequencies of pure being are eternal.  They are infinite potential.  So infinite potential here manifests as change.  A change of mind, of purer mind, a change of emotion, of purer feelings, a change of will, pure direction, and all manner of life.  So Tantra is really about change and manifesting the real amongst that change, become truly creative and allow to come in finer and finer frequencies of light, of love, and of experience beyond the current you.  Beyond your current understanding.  That's how you grow.  So Tantra is you growing as the tree of life.  Growing as a human being participating in universal Tantra.  Real touch, first touch.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Well, speaking of change, and I think we just have to have this one more question and then we're going to close the show, so glad we have you for one more.  But how do you know when it's time to change soulmates, I mean, you know, how do you know when you're done with this one and move on?

Bernie Prior:  Well, you know, if you listen to the question, there's an agenda behind it, when we hear that in a – how do I know when I'm done? - If you're ever hearing that inside yourself I would say hold on a minute, you're already escaping, you're already avoiding, what is it that other is reflecting in you that you don't want to look at it yet?  So in other words, let's go and pick someone else from a willful sentence, not in integrity.  That is not in the true purpose of being with this partner.  It's actually just to get what you want.  Because when it is time to move on, if it is time to move on, we don't make that choice as men and women.  That other place that we're endeavoring to get in contact with, as Tantric as, it does it.  Otherwise we will be good and willful.  So it makes the movement.  So we know this and often we refuse to have a look that we know if we're absolutely frankly honest with ourselves, we want to move on because this is getting frightening.  I'm beginning to face things inside of my consciousness that I never had coming up before and so let's run and pick someone that doesn't put the pressure on.  Do you understand?  [laughs]

Dr. Patti Taylor:  It's true, it does seem like things end when it gets a little too much for me to deal with.

Bernie Prior:  And that's the challenge, and of course as long as we see ourselves as victims of others, and you only ever become a victim of an other if you think an other is your love.  When you start to engage your innermost, your innermost knowing of what love is and you begin to live it, then you come into contact, into connection with a never-ending source of love and that's yourself and you can't help but see it in others.  You can't help but see it in your lover and you begin to meet them in that place.  So then you come to this place where, and this is true Tantra, that you're not a victim, nobody ever did anything to you, you are an autonomous creator of the universe and that's what you are as men and women and when you really get that, your love starts to fly high.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Wow.  That's where I want to go, and I'm starting to really understand a little bit more about dropping into that level of being.  So we're going to close out this show for now, I'd like to know if you'd like to leave a parting sentiment with our listeners before we close the show.

Bernie Prior:  Yeah, I think that in all of life, this is so easy and it's kind of like 21st century talk, which is, what address are you currently living at?  You know, what address?  Where are you living from, where are you living from in this moment.  Are you living from the real?  That is inviting you into a new place?    Or are you living from ego?  So check out your address and be really honest with it.  Because then you're moving to a real address.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  I love that.  Thank you so much.  God, I do that, I love that very much.  It's short and simple to remember, too.  So I like that.  Thank you so much, Bernie.

Bernie Prior:  Thank you.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Yes, so we are going to bring the show to an end, thank you listeners for joining us today.  Please send me email at  [email protected].  For text and transcripts of this show, and other shows on the Personal Life Media network, pleas visit our website at personallifemedia.com.  If you haven't already, please be sure to subscribe to the Expanded Lovemaking Show, so you can get automatic updates as soon as they become available.  This is your host, Dr. Patti Taylor, that's all for now and I remain yours in ever expanding lovemaking and I'll see you next week.