Episode 60: The Art of Taking a Woman Over the Edge (Part Two) with Daka Raj

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Hear Dr. Patti continue her juicy chat with Daka Raj about the art of doing a woman. “Doing”, which is the  act of giving someone genital pleasure, can be used to take a woman to the heights of prolonged ecstasy, felt in the body, mind, heart, and spirit of both the giver and receiver. We begin with considering ways to stay “in the flow” of the date, and what to do when the giver starts wondering, “what’s next?”

We consider ways to bring a woman into higher states of pleasure, until a giver chooses to take her over orgasmic edges. Learn what strokes you might try to accomplish this! Find out what to do once you’ve brought a woman over the orgasmic edge to keep her there. And, discover the fun there is to be had on the “downside” or aftermath of a do date. All this and more is way fun, as Dr. Patti and Daka Raj get totally turned on, just talking about talking…and  teasing… giving exquisite pleasure… and more!. You’ll even learn a little more about what Patti is up to next.

Transcript

Dr. Patti Taylor: Welcome to the “Expanded Lovemaking Show”. I am your host Dr. Patti Taylor of expandedlovemaking.com and I teach you how to make exquisite love. This is part two of a two part series.

We’ve been having a lot of fun in talking about how to do a woman, put pleasurable attention on her genitals, so that she has amazing expanded orgasms that go through her body, her heart, her mind, and her spirit. And so we have this woman receiving. All ready in our conversation we’ve talked about giving her great attention right on her favorite spot and being continuous.

I am talking to Daka Raj who is one of my advanced students. He wrote up a list of questions. So we are just going to continue on.

If you haven’t heard part one please start with that, if you want. But we are just going to keep going because it’s feeling really warm in here and really good in here.

Part of what you really want to learn in this practice is how to keep coming back, like a rubber band, to center line.

If you get really in touch with that feeling, that place, you are so present you will know what to do. You will feel it. She will guide you. She will feel that you’re feeling really good and it will just translate into her going higher.

There is this model of giving a woman an orgasm where your just applying pressure, intrigue, intensity, and speed or whatever, and that’s model A. And then there’s model B where your offering a woman a range of sensations, but the goal in the reaching part of the offer is to get the woman to be hungry for your touch.

So, hi Daka Raj.

Daka Raj: Hi Dr. Patti. It’s great to be here.

Dr. Patti Taylor: It’s great to have you back.

Daka Raj: So I think at the end of the last show I was about to ask you a question or started to ask you a question. So let me start there.

I am doing a woman and I’m touching her favorite spot. I am being consistent. And now I want to issue an invitation for her to surrender more deeply and continue issuing that invitation.  Can you talk a little bit about how I might do that with my with my touch, with my hands, with my being?

Dr. Patti Taylor: OK. Do you want to just sort of state for everyone what you mean by issuing an invitation.

Daka Raj: It’s…So I am stroking her and I want to basically give her a communication somehow that I am inviting her to climb even higher. Like maybe I feel her plateaued for a little bit for a little bit and I want her to go even higher, but I am not sure what to do next. But I want to, basically, have her open up and expand her awareness.

Dr. Patti Taylor: OK. So you want to take her higher basically.

Daka Raj: Exactly.

Dr. Patti Taylor: OK. Your question sort of reveals an understanding that you can’t make her go higher. You can only set the stage for her to climb on her own.

Daka Raj: Exactly on her own.

Daka Raj: Exactly. That we are in a dance together and I can’t make her do anything that she doesn’t want to do.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Right. But you would love to be the hero that takes her to ever higher and wonderful places.

There are a lot of things that you can do. One of them is that you can feel more in your own body. One of the things about going into more orgasmic states is that we tend to tense up as the energy gets intense. So we go [breathing like she is in pain]. Of course, I am exaggerating. And we tend to go into our heads. Am I doing this right? What do I do next? So there are ways where part of what you really want to learn in this practice is how to keep coming back, like a rubber band, to center line.

So you want to notice-periodically do body scans -where there is any tension in your body, in your hands. Maybe all the energy went to your head. So you can start doing some breathing. Just picture that you’re breathing all the up from the ground then through the top of your head and then pulling breathe down and through your body and letting it out through your hands.

And start feeling yourself. Start allowing your own being to go back into that place where you’re just feeling the next stroke. Which means that if your mind was starting to run away with, am I doing it right, or where should I go, or whatever, if you get really in touch with that feeling place your so present you will know what to do. You will feel it.

She will guide you. She will know that you’re feeling really good and it will just translate into her going higher and higher.

Daka Raj: So what I am hearing you say is, just open yourself up to just feeling in the present moment and let go of any expectations of the future and all recollections of the past. So it’s really about being really present to the now, as well.

Dr. Patti Taylor. Yes. That kind of sounds simplistic, but it’s actually very profound. And you have to keep doing it like every couple of minutes at the very minimum because it’s amazing how quickly junk accumulates. I mean, you floss your teeth once a day, right? Because stuff accumulates and no one doubts that you need to do that. It’s very obvious.

Well, you need to reset yourself into present time on an expanded orgasm date because there’s always more that you can feel. There is always more that you can drop your mind and get into the present mind. When you want to go higher, that’s a great way of doing it.

Another great way is to talk.

Daka Raj: So what are some of the things…? .How do you like to talk on a date? What are some of the things you like to hear?

Dr. Patti Taylor: The thing about talking is that as you are climbing and a woman is getting really turned on she is going to be belting out some really intense energy and it’s a lot. OK? It’s kind of easy to get into outer space with your expanded orgasm and what happens in outer space? Well, you don’t feel as much in outer space as you do right here on the bed where it is very grounded and you’re really feeling every stroke. There is a very physical dimension to this.

So if you’re feeling…let’s say for the giver, but it’s true for the receiver. If either one of you is feeling like, I am just king of going out on a trip of some kind, talking is great. And it doesn’t have to be prose that would make it into a poetry journal or something. It can be very very simple. You can just start calling the peaks, just, peak, peak, peak, and peak. The sound of your voice will bring the woman back. Or it could be really basic observations, compliments, ‘you feel really warm’, ‘well there is a nice contraction’.

What happens for me when I am giving an expanded orgasm is I actually find it very easy to talk. I like to play with someone. So I might tease them a little bit and say, “Well you’re really climbing nicely now.”  And, of course, that’s a nice thing to say. And then I might say, “I don’t know if it’s time to stop yet.” And, of course, the receiver might just get a little charge out of that. “Oh my God, it’s feeling really good. Who said anything about stopping?” Right? So, that will really get there attention.

Then I will continue giving the sensation, but then I will say, “Well, probably not. This is feeling really good.” So they will know that I am joking. But it has a great effect, that little bit of playful teasing.

Then I might go on and say, “Oh, I would never do a thing like that.” And then I keep giving sensation. Then I go, “Well, maybe I will.”

Daka Raj: So talking is one of the vehicles that you’ll use, of course, while teasing a person and bring them higher.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Right. Just to stay present.

Daka Raj: So…

Dr. Patti Taylor: And also to take them higher.

Daka Raj: …what do you do to stay in that place of not knowing and still exude energy and confidence of being in control?

Dr. Patti Taylor: As the giver.

Daka Raj: As the giver, yes.

Dr. Patti Taylor: OK. So what you are saying is: I have told you to say in present time and not go off on a head trip.  Yet, how do you lead somebody into ever higher states at the same time?

 It’s kind of a paradox. As the giver you might be inclined to say, “ I am just following her energy.” But if you ask the receiver she might say, “Well, I am just surrendering into him.” So when there is that flow and it’s really happening, it almost seems like your responding to the other person. You don’t need to know what to do next.

It really just all breaks down when the energy is kind of falling, tapering, and going no where and that’s when the problems happen.

Daka Raj: Yeah. I let’s say you have her in a place where you have plateaued. Now I want to stay in this place of being really present and not knowing, and still have her get the sense of control from me, and also to lead her. So what’s the key to doing that?

Dr. Patti Taylor: OK. Well, if you’ve plateaued that means your not going any higher. You’re sort of in a very stable area.

There are two things you can do. Number one you can try adding variety. But if you’re not knowing then you are probably in some confusion already. My guess is, go back to finding her favorite spot. Drop back to where you really are feeling something wonderful from her. Drop back to that place in what your giving her where you are going, “Where is her favorite spot again? Am I at her absolute favorite spot? Am I being consistent?” 

You’re dialing back to the earlier things you did because people change. A woman could be going, going, going, and then ‘poof’ just sort of drop. Who knows why? It doesn’t really matter. But if that happens, you need to follow her. But it’s like I’ve lost the thread and when you find that you’re in a place of not knowing you want to pick that thread again. And if your in a place of not knowing you want to get back to the place of not knowing but where it’s not a plateau, where you are in that place of give and take that seems like that perfect optimal dance.

Daka Raj: Thank you.

So what are some the things…? Now you have her expanded and open. What are some of the ways you can add variety to the date to really juice up this. You’re in this plateau and now you want to take her higher, but you want to add variety to the day. What are some of the different things you can do, maybe, with your upper hand or your lower hand?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Oh that’s right, we we’re going to talk about the lower hand weren’t we? Ok Good.

Well, you want to add variety because even a great orgasm gets boring if all you are doing is being continuous. So let’s just talk about the lower hand for a moment.

At some point you definitely want to being in the lower hand. You can start out with the fingers cupped under the but and your thumb is just on a woman’s vaginal opening. But at some point she’ll probably invite you inside. So you can go in kind of slowly quarter inch by quarter inch because the vaginal opening is very very open to touch. And you kind of want to open up her vaginal area to; king of like you woke up her clit.

In order to do this, I highly recommend that you kind of put your top hand due finger kind of on auto pilot, just sort of  hang it out there on her favorite spot and do a pretty slow- not slow- but a pretty steady stroke so that you don’t have to think about it. Kind of, focus on the bottom hand. You can do some wonderful things. 

You can kind of sweep your fingers across of her opening. When your in, let’s just say, only to your first knuckle go all the way around form one side to the other. I call that windshield wipers. And that will really wake up that opening in the vaginal canal. That is a great stroke. And tell her, “I am doing windshield wipers” because that’s probably at the point where she is not being so sensitive to touch any more, but feel pressure. So she will love to know that you’re doing that.

Then you can go in a little further, probably somewhere between the first and second knuckle. You can kind of bend your fingers. Split them a little so you miss her urethral opening. And you can kind of hook up under her pelvic bone and start doing the ‘come hither’ motion, which is truly you are kind of just moving from the second knuckle with either one finger or two and you’ll probably be getting her urethral sponge, also known as the G spot, also known as the G area. Passed that, there’s a lot of spots that you can start exploring.

Daka Raj: Yeah, I have really noticed with some women that they really like a slow gentle stroke inside or maybe they just want the one finger at first and other women I have done sometimes they want intense pressure in certain spots where they have what are called fun spots that really light their whole body up and their whole being up.

Dr. Patti Taylor: So, I am going to take a break. I want to ask you more about that so please stay with us.

This is Dr. Patti Taylor. I am here with Daka Raj.  We will be right back.

You can find out more about me at expandedlovemaking.com.

[Sponsor break]

Dr. Patti Taylor: We are back. I am Dr. Patti Taylor. And we are talking about the art of doing a woman, with Daka Raj.

Daka Raj: So we were just talking about fun spots before we took a little break. I think you were going to ask me some questions or you have something else you want to add to that.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Yeah, I was just going to ask you what kind of spots have you found down there.

Daka Raj: Well, like for example, some women have almost like these channels on either side of their urethral sponge area. So sometimes a woman will really enjoy stroking right under the pubic bone in one of those channels or maybe really far back in one of those channels. There are certain spots in there that will just totally drive them wild.

One other place I have noticed is if you go even farther back past the…really far back inside of her. I am not really… It feels amazing. I think you call it the Q spot.

Dr. Patti Taylor: That’s right.

Daka Raj: So those are some areas to explore. Of course, every woman is different.

Dr. Patti Taylor: That’s true. And you can actually put your thumb in there and press down.

Daka Raj: Oh yes, that totally lights some women up.

Actually, I remember feeling a spot inside one lady that felt like a little pearl underneath her skin when you press down against the floor of her vagina and it felt amazing.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, the whole area in there is just lined with different orgasmic nerves. So once you get inside you’re going to want to focus more on applying pressure rather than just touching to create an effect. There is no need to have it be right in the middle. I mean, there’s lots and lots of areas.

But I want to say that I always recommend that you can go exploring all you want, but just remember don’t have it as your goal your just going to go in deeper and deeper and more and more, which again is that thinking. You want to…because that might bring her down. That might take her energy down, if it’s there to long. I mean, don’t forget we are sort of doing a dance between adding energy and spreading energy. So we are adding adding adding energy, but then we want to give her a chance to sort of digest it.

So those might be times when you those might be times when you pull your hand out for just a bit and if you  were in quite a bit, for example, go back to where you  were to the first knuckle or doing the G spot , so that there is that variety. And that will actually take her higher in the long run.

Daka Raj: One of the things…and I would like you to tell me what you think about this, but you talk frequently about reaching and delivering. So a lot of times what I will find myself doing when I am doing a woman is getting her to retire and getting her to reach higher and higher and higher and then I will add some intensity with possibly more insertion or more pressure or maybe even more speed, and maybe, only one of those qualities.

Can you talk a little bit more about how that is for you, that ‘reach and deliver’?
 
Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, I think that there is this model of giving a woman an orgasm where you’re just applying pressure, intensity, and speed, or whatever and that’s model A. Then there’s model B where you’re offering a woman a range of sensations, but the goal in the reaching part of the offer is to get the woman to be hungry for your touch. So you are giving her that.

So rather than gust giving her something, your actually looking for that resilient edge where she is coming up to reach you, to feel you.  Where giving her maybe just a hair less than what would drive her over the edge or whatever. You’re kind of stringing her along. Actually it is kind of a gentle stroking and she can be contracting like crazy because she’s just trying to reach out for all the sensation possible.

Then for the delivering, when she is just totally maximally reached out, then as the guy you deliver some sensation to her. It’s like you kind of go in there and really satisfy that craving. Scratch that itch. Just pout hot fudge all over that Sundae. Whatever you want to do. Just give it to her. And you flood her with sensation. And since she is so washed out and surrendered, the degree of sensation that is going to wash out over her body is just incredible.

Then you do the whole process all over again so that it is a climbing dance of having her reach and then delivering the sensation.

Pretty fun, huh?

Daka Raj: Very very fun.

So one other had before we take this woman over the edge is how do you… You talk about psychic energy. I think we need to talk about this a little bit. How does a newbie learn to use psychic energy to take a woman higher to give her pleasure?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, I think…again, we talked about this in the first show. There has to be a place for the man to really acknowledge his own psychic power. And the fact that when you have a dew date, a really good expanded orgasm dew date, you are really connecting in four dimensions all at once, physically, mentally, sexually, and energetically.

And so, I think a lot of guys get hung up on the technique because they try to apply what they would like on their cocks and there are a lot of comparisons, but it’s not at all one for one. And it is like the energetic stuff too.

But with the energy you just have to really own it, that you can do a woman with your energy. And if you have any doubt about that, I would highly recommend that one night you just say to your woman, “Hey babe, lie down and I’m going to bring you over the edge without touching you.” Now a guy might think that’s impossible. And you know, see how far you get just doing her energetically and at some point maybe you do touch her, but the whole point is to do it energetically because there is a whole world inside an energetic dew and I think that that would be a really good way for you as the giver to really get how really powerful that is. And when you combine that with technique, oh my God, that’s just amazing.

Daka Raj: That’s great.

So in a sense you’re saying a guy should practice at first with a woman maybe in a little sandbox they do on a separate night. But too actually, when you have that awareness and the energy then you bring that together with this technique, that super accelerates things.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Absolutely!

That reminds me that I was working with a couple once. He was telling me he couldn’t get her engorged. So my teaching partner and I did the woman without touching her. He did it mostly, in this particular case. But it was the way he looked at her. It was the things he said to her. It was powerful. He had so much attention on her that he was just sitting across from her. She was actually lying down. He was close to her and she started to get really engorged. And he came in closer and closer just putting his attention on her, just noticing her. , just noticing her.

You could cut the tension in the room- but it was a good tension- with scissors. It was so intense. Then finally, he touched her. But by the time he touched her- or almost touched her- but by the time his finger go there she was rock hard. OK?

Daka Raj: That’s great. Thank you. Things for us to practice. Very fun.

So now you have her really out there, really expanded, and you want to take her. Often times a guy and a woman will want to  have the over the edge experience. Not every day it has to be like that. But I want to ask you, what is a technique that you have for taking a woman over the edge? If you have applied variety and energy and now you want to bring her into that over the edge experience.

Dr. Patti: OK. So that’s a great question. We are going to pause for a moment to support our sponsors and then I will come back and answer that. Leave you dangling here, before taking you over the edge here.

This is Dr. Patti Taylor and I am here with Daka Raj. I think we will be right back. I don’t know. Unless we go off and do something else. What do you think?

Daka Raj: Well, we could sneak a little quickie in there.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Maybe we will come back and maybe we won’t. Then again, I was only kidding. Of course, we’ll be right back.

Anyway, you can learn more about me at expandedlovemaking.com.

Please stay with us. That’s your side of the deal. We will be right back.

[Sponsor break]

Dr. Patti Taylor: We’re back. I am Dr. Patti Taylor. You’re Daka Raj. And things are getting a bit steamy in here. We are talking about the art of doing a woman.

Daka Raj: My question was: You have a woman dangling, and juicy, and wet, and screaming. What is the thing that you need to do if you actually want to take her over an edge, you want to give her that experience, and you want to have that experience and bring her over an edge?

Dr. Patti Taylor: OK. Well, she may be screaming, and she may be very quite. We’ll see. It depends on the woman. But you want to take her over the edge. So you can do that with any number of ways.

I am going to just give you one way, which is that you’ve been doing things. I mean, yes, you have been continuous, but you want to shift it into adding variety. You added the bottom hand. You have been doing things with the bottom hand. Maybe, you’ve been changing your stroke. Maybe you’ve been changing your pressure.

Now at some point either when she let’s you know she’s ready to go over the edge, that is probably when you want to take her over the edge, or maybe when you’ve decided you’ve teased and tormented her mercilessly for so long that you take pity on her and say, Ok, I am going to take her over the edge, because she’s just been dangling out here for so long. You have some heart.

Sop one thing you can do is simplify everything. You want to go now into a situation where you become very single minded, single focused. So whatever you were doing before that is over with. You just want to start going stroke stroke stroke, with your bottom hand, with your top hand. You can alternate them. It can be very hot.

But you want to get very very simple and you want to gradually increase the intensity. Now you often that means speed and pressure or energetic capacity.

We talked about that in the first show. Where, you are spreading your own energy. You are feeling your own body. So increase your own energy, speed, and pressure. And you don’t stop. You just keep going at a very measured pace. And maybe, of course, if you’re speeding you’re increasing it at a regular pace. And at some point she gets it now, you are not going to stop.

So that’s a real head fuck for somebody when they know there had and things aren’t going to stop. There is no more variety. You’re heading for the end post here, the golden pot at the end of the end of the rainbow. So there is this inevitability that she feels and that you’re delivering.

Daka Raj: So it’s both an intention and it’s also from a technique point of view. You’re really focusing to a single-mindedness or almost single-mindedness.

One of the things that it reminds me of is you’ve taught me this technique of simply increasing the stroke or the speed or the pressure, but doing just one thing, which is changing the focus between the top hand and the bottom hand. And that is also one specific technique you can use.

Yeah, that’s great.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Right. You just think about a train coming into the station and nothing can stop it. You want to be to be unstoppable.

And I think the main thing your going to want to figure out at that point is how much intensity and at what rate. Sometimes you can take a woman over an edge by going lighter and lighter and lighter and lighter and then at the final moment you just press. That will do it too. So we often think about more speed, more intensity, but sometimes you can get lighter and lighter and lighter until she is reaching so much that when you deliver it’s just unbelievably intense with not very much speed or intensity.

But she knows that you’re going to go the distance with her. And I think you have to communicate that. You have to have that in your bones.

Daka Raj: So you have taken her over an edge and maybe, you might even want to take her over a couple edges. Maybe, if you could say a few words about that. How would you take a woman over two or three edges?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, a lot of times a woman will be thrilled to go over multiple edges. I mean, women are multiplee orgasmic so why stop with one edge, right? And this is assuming that that’s what she wants because sometimes she won’t even want to go over the edge.

I don’t always want to go over the edge. Some days I don’t have the energy or the inclination. I just want to hang out and coast. It feels good. Other days I really want to go over the edge. And sometimes there are dates where it just seems like I’m going over an edge.

Oddly enough I think if you’ve gotten to the point where you can take a woman over the edge. And you’ve taken her over the edge.  We’re in a range where things are getting very easy now because you are so are so expanded, you are so lucid, you have already “succeeded”, that it becomes very easy to follow the energy. Very often that might mean that you slow down and increase the pressure while she just goes over the edge and you are just present with her. And sometimes you just continue it from there.

Or sometimes you might want to back off. You know, tracking continuous, just go very light, and act like you are continuing all over again. But usually by the time a guy has taken that woman over the edge they know together what they are going to want to procreate and it’s extremely easy. That’s the best part about this.

Daka Raj: That’s great.

So now you have taken her over the edge and I think it’s time to bring her down. We need to get her grounded. What some of the techniques that you like the most for getting a woman back into her body and feeling here now?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, it is important to bring a woman back into her body and for the giver to come back into his body too because it is a very intense experience.

 Pressure is going to be the key word here. You can apply pressure with both hands. Kind of make a sandwich with what is inside. With the inside hand you can just pull up, almost like your lifting her up. And with the top hand you can press down. Less motion is better now, maybe, no motion whatsoever. She may be intensely sensitive. Or you may just kind of slow down. So it’s just all about the pressure. And you can probably use a lot more pressure than you thought.

Daka Raj: Are there some other techniques, say like lying on top of her or cuddling? What might you do after you put pressure on her?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Lying on top of her will probably feel really good if the two of you do that kind of thing. So that’s another thing.

Daka Raj: And do you think…

Dr. Patti Taylor: What do you think?

Daka Raj: Well, one of the things I like to do is when I am bringing a woman down I will notice that I am actually peaking her on the way down. I will have heavy pressure and grounding and, maybe, barely moving. And then I will say, “Ah, she wants a few strokes. OK.” Women don’t want to necessarily want to come straight down. They want to enjoy the ride down. So there is a little peak, and another little peak, and another little peak.

Then even after I have done that, if I am only going to do a dew date I might ask her if she would like a pull up. And that’s…I could describe it briefly, but I would put one of my hands in side of her and pull up under her pubic bone with the other hand on top of that and really pull up with a lot of pressure after I have gotten my hand well established where it needs to be. That is another way.

Then I just like to hang out with her. I’ll have my hands on her body. I’ll take my hands out. I’ll towel her off and have one hand on her chest and one hand on her pussy. I’ll just hang out, talk with her, fell her body, and get us both in our bodies.

Dr. Patti Taylor: That sounds so nice. A woman can have several orgasms on the down side. For one reason, the pressure is off to perform. And if she has already been multi-orgasmic or just had a great orgasm these will be the aftershocks and they’re some of the nicest of all because no one is trying to get any goal met any more. There can actually be quite a bit of fun to be had at this point in the date.

Daka Raj: What are some of the things that a couple might do if they have the kind of relationship where they can do other things?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, I am going to hold off on that until we support our sponsors. So this is Dr. Patti Taylor and I am here with Daka Raj. So come on back.

You can learn more about me at expandedlovemaking.com.

We will be right back.

[Sponsor break]

Dr. Patti Taylor: We’re back. I am Dr. Patti Taylor. We are talking about the art of doing a woman with Daka Raj.

So Daka Raj what were we talking about anyway?

Daka Raj: Well, one of the questions I had for you is what are the things that a couple could do if it’s appropriate once they’ve gotten down a little bit from the dew date and they want to connect in some other way? So you’re long term committed relationship or your lover’s.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well this is the time for a number of things including the man could give the woman oral sex. The woman by this time is probably in a very beneficent mood feeling very turned on. This would be a great time for her to give the man pleasure.
She can do him. That is why everything we learn about doing a woman we also teach for how to do a man. This is an equal opportunity practice. So that would be really hot because they’re both really turned on.

If you are going to do the man, I would recommend that you don’t bring her down to much from the doing

Of course, intercourse would probably be wonderful at this point too.

Daka Raj: Excellent.

How does this practice apply to men?  …Yeah.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, I think everything that you learn as a giver will make you a better receiver and everything that you learn as a receiver will make giver. So I highly highly highly encourage everyone to be both a giver and a receiver because there is this way in which it opens up the channels of your mind. Once you have been a giver you know what…it helps you ask for things better as a receiver. You know what it is like to talk or to have someone talk and to communicate with you.

And if it’s always one way then it just puts you on a narrow pattern. But to do it both ways teaches you the most. For example, if I’m the giver to a man then I will start applying, ok, I am the one that needs to create a safe place for the man to surrender into. So suddenly my consciousness is really focused on what can I do to put him at rest and put him at ease and knowing that  helps me to understand that when I am the receiver I have some issues about being put at rest and being put at ease that I want my giver to  understand this.

 So we understand both roles better when we do them both. And I think that we can do both roles better, if that’s not too circular.

Daka Raj: I certainly agree with that. It’s a lot of fun to be the receiver and I certainly learn about how to be a better doer as a receiver.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, male expanded organ. We will have to do a show on that alone. Absolutely.

Daka Raj: That would be a lot of fun.

So let me ask you: what are some of the ways you’re putting this material out in the world? And what are your plans for the future?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, as you know, I have a DVD out where you can see a woman in a state of orgasm for- I don’t know- half hour, forty five minutes.\

Daka Raj: I think the actual orgasm is about an hour and a half. I think that’s right. But I want to mention I have actually watched that video about six times. It is probably time for me to watch it again, but it’s amazing.

Dr. Patti Taylor: It is an amazing video. I’ve watched it myself probably 30 times because I had to edit it for something and, even I, learn stuff from it all the time. It’s actually mind blowing because to see it…You know, human beings learn from neuro neurons. We are mimickers. So there is something quite amazing about seeing someone in a state of orgasm, being given that orgasm. I mean, you pick up thousands of cues that are just there in the space.

Daka Raj: I was also wondering if you would be willing to describe your coaching practice and some of the ways you work one on one with people.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Yeah, I just want to add that I am working on a series of booklets that are coming out and that I will announce. That is a good reason to get on my mailing list, expandedlovemaking.com. So that’s in the works.

Yeah, usually I work with couples and every couple is different. One of them will come in and their main issues are emotional. Another one I will observe the couple and I will just feel what is going on with them and sometimes the tiniest most subtle physical changes like changing the angle or just observing that he is not even on her current or a hundred different things will shift the entire experience from wherever they are at and take it to another level. So it has always been incredibly amazing to work with couples.

Daka Raj: So that’s the sort of observational coaching that you do. You actually would notice, in some cases, the small things that people are doing that aren’t quite right and just a small date will totally change a date or shift their lovemaking into another dimension.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Right. So Sometimes it’s really major things like they don’t even know really how to get into the right dew position. Then you have to set up the pillows and make sure that they’re comfortable. You really want to optimize that.

All the way down to people who are real sharp shooters and real geniuses and they’re coming because they want to be even more of a genius. They are like if I have even one thing to learn from this, I am there. So get me there. I work with those people too.

Daka Raj: Great. Great.

Now you mentioned …I want to pass over this because you mentioned booklets that are coming out. Want to tell us a little bit more about what that is going to look like, what that might look like, or what you are planning there?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Oh sure. I have been teaching a lot about how to touch someone so that they have an orgasm just from the first touch and there are so many different ways of touching someone- we are not even talking genital- that will blow your mind and will take you into an orgasmic state. Expanded orgasm stuff is another book. It’s got one on the expanded male orgasm, which is a profound phenomenal act also. Even how to throw a good sensual party is another one.

So a lot of different ideas. I am kind of looking forward to getting them up because I have so many other ideas.

Daka Raj: Yes. You are definitely a creative genius. It is really fun to have an opportunity to spend time with you this way and to have you answer my questions and some of my questions that I have gotten over the years, and to hear what you’ve got to say about them. So I thank you for spending this time with me.

Dr. Patti Taylor. Oh wow! It’s been really hot, actually. I’m… [Laughter] The temperature went up about 30 degrees since we’ve been talking. So fun too.

Daka Raj: Is there any last words you want to share with the world about any topic that we have been talking about today?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Let me give that some thought.

You’re woman will love you for putting attention on her, for studying how to put even more attention on her. The more you do it and the better you get it will just warm her heart more than you could ever imagine because she will feel the love that comes with this practice. I think it’s an incredibly loving thing to do to put this much attention. This is so much more than sex. This is a profound connection.

 So I really encourage the men to step up to the plate and be willing to put this amount of loving attention on their partner. Their partner will thank them, particularly as they get better and better. It’s just a path that expands out incredibly and gets better and better and better.

I was going to ask you: do you have any parting thoughts?

Daka Raj: Just that this is a path that just keeps expanding. That you get better as a doer and better and better and better. It just adds to the quality of your life. It is definitely worth doing.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Amen.

Daka Raj: I just want to again thank you. What you said was beautiful and I really appreciate having this time with you today.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Thank you so much. You’re attention on me and what I have to say was a real turn on too. So we’re hot.

Okey. Dokey. That does bring us to the end of our show. We want to thank you all listeners for listening.

Please send me email at [email protected].

For text and transcripts of this show and other shows on the Personal Life Media Network please visit our website at personallifemedia.com.

Also, please join me Dr. Patti Taylor at expandedlovemaking.com where you can join my mailing list and find out more about my products, services, and events.

This is Dr. Patti Taylor and that’s all for now. I remain yours in ever expanding lovemaking. I’ll see you next week.