Episode 5: Orgasm Into the Light with Dr. Patti Taylor, Expanded Orgasm Queen, author, & Certified Sexological Bodyworker

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Francesca, The Diva of Divine Relationships interviews Dr. Patti Taylor, Queen of Expanded Orgasm, best selling author and Certified Sexological Bodyworker. Dr. Patti shares the secret arts of love ignited by her near death experience and kundalini awakening. In this episode Francesca and Patti dive into orgasm as a path of bliss and awakening as well as practical exercises to try at home like "sweet rocking," " transformational touch," and "hot appreciations." Dr. Patti exposes key information from her 21 years of Tantric exploration and her works "Expand Her Orgasm Tonite," "The Enchantment of Opposites," and "Expanded Orgasm Soar to Ecstacy at Your Lover's Every Touch." Learn how to win with blissful lovemaking.

Transcript

“Orgasm Into the Light” with Dr. Patti Taylor

Woman:  This program is intended for mature audiences only.

[Music]

Francesca Gentille:  Welcome to “Sex, Tantra and Kama Sutra.”  I’m your host, Francesa Gentille, and we’re bringing you the “Soul of Sex” with Dr. Patti Taylor.  Patti is the leading teacher of expanded orgasm in the world today.

[Music continues in the background]

Dr. Patti Taylor:  About 21 years ago I had a near death experience.  I was a very conservative person.  I dressed for success; I had the little bow tie and the pearls.  One day I actually just had one of these spontaneous near death experiences, sort of a spiritual awakening, the kind you read about sometimes.  Well it happened to me.  I did nothing on my own to create it.  I was really sort of letting go, my career just didn’t work for me anymore.  I had one of these expanded orgasms, and it was like “Oh my God, I’m going back into the light again.”  Not only that, but it’s free and it’s legal, and I can have them on tap.  I have got to learn how to have these!  And that’s how I got involved with learning how to have expanded orgasms.

[Music continues in the background]

Francesca Gentille:  Patti, what is expanded orgasm?

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Hi Francesca, it’s great to be here.  Expanded orgasm is an art that goes back many, many generations, probably to the beginning of time.  It’s something that people do that takes the normal orgasm that usually just lasts for just a very brief amount of time and it extends that period of time, so something that usually feels really, really good, but only lasts for 10 seconds or something, now feels really, really good, but can now last for five minutes or ten minutes and not only can it feel fabulous, but it can spread through your entire body, your mind, your heart, your spirit.  Your partner can feel everything you’re feeling, and you can actually have very extraordinary experiences and connect with the divine, so it’s quite an amazing experience.

Francesca Gentille:  Who wouldn’t want something like that?  That deliciousness, it lasts a long time, it spreads throughout the whole body.  It’s great to hear that it’s something that’s been around a long time.  Now this is something where you’re the leading expert in this.  How did you become a leading expert in expanded orgasm?

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Exactly.  Well, I was a money manager on Wall Street.  About 21 years ago I had a near death experience.  I was a very conservative person.  I dressed for success; I had the little bow tie and the pearls.  One day I actually just had one of these spontaneous near death experiences, sort of a spiritual awakening, the kind you read about sometimes.  Well it happened to me.  I did nothing on my own to create it.   It took about six weeks leading up to it; all these weird things started happening to me.  This energy went through me, and I went into this place.  I went into this white light and this amazing energy.  It was so intense, and so amazing.  It was totally orgasmic.  It was just the most incredible experience I’ve ever had and the most unforgettable.  Everything was connected; everything was bliss, pure bliss!  When I came back--first of all, I never thought I was coming back, but obviously I came back.

Francesca Gentille:  What do you mean, “came back”?

Dr. Patti Taylor:  I came back into this reality, because it was a near death experience I didn’t think I was coming back.  But I did come back, much to my shock and surprise, into this dimension.  And I was a different person.  My heart was full of love.  My priorities were totally different.  I could see that we are all connected, and it totally changed my life.  So now fast forward three years.  I had my first expanded orgasm.  Someone said, “Patti, you really ought to try one of these, I think you’ll like them.”  Now I was into Tantra.  I was still managing money, but I was really sort of letting go, my career just didn’t work for me anymore.  I had one of these expanded orgasms, and it was like “Oh my God, I’m going back into the light again.”  It wasn’t quite as intense, but it was like this was the same kind of light.  When I came back out of my expanded orgasm, I thought, I can’t believe that my own body would be the source of this kind of feeling of love and connectedness and inspiration, that is so bigger than myself.   Not only that, but it’s free and it’s legal, and I can have them on tap.  I have got to learn how to have these!  And that’s how I got involved with learning how to have expanded orgasms.

Francesca Gentille:  So you had that experience, a near death experience, where you start to go into the light, and yet you came back into your own body.  I’ve read and heard that it is such a loss in a sense when we come back into the body, and yet you are so filled with this incredible love.  Then you discovered that expanded orgasm brings you back to that same light.  I’ve never heard that this divine light that many of us have heard about as God, as Source, would be that same light that would be possible through our own bodies.  What are the key tips that our listeners could start walking into that light right now, is there something that they could do that would maybe just begin to get them there?

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Well let me just say this, I think a lot of people find their own way into the light.  For Buddists, it is going into the void, for example.  For a Christian mystic it might be meditating on the cross.  So I think there are many versions of the light.  I want to say that what this light was is a very orgasmic kind of light, and I am not the first person to go into this kind of light.  So what this kind of light was is the Tantric light, or a kind of Tantric light, that has been talked about for many, many thousands of years.  The Tantricas, the lineage of the Cashmeri chauvists[sp], (and anyone who wants to write me I’ll be very happy to spell that out for them, it‘s a very…) have been practicing this for thousands of years.  So they’ve known about this, and they do teach it.  And what this is, is actually a very, very well known divine path of full engagement.  So what you want to do is you want to integrate your mind, your body, your heart, and your spirit.  So if our listeners really wanted to start on that path right now, and get a sense of what it’s like, I’ll try and give you a picture.  Most of the time…

Francesca Gentille:   Patti, I’m going to interrupt you just right here so we can go to a break, and tell more about that picture, of how to integrate mind, body, heart and spirit with Dr. Patti Taylor, author of “Expanded Orgasm,” who is happy to have you write her at www.expandedlovemaking.com.  We’ll be back after a word from our sponsors.  Thank you, Patti.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  You’re welcome.

[commercial break]

[music]

Francesca Gentille:   Welcome back to “Sex, Tantra and Kama Sutra,” bringing you the “Soul of Sex.”  Our fabulous guest today is Dr. Patti Taylor, who is the author of “Expanded Orgasms” DVDs and as well as a book, although the DVD is “Expanded Orgasm Tonight.”  We’re going to be going back into what it takes to integrate mind, body, heart and spirit and bring us closer into that Tantric light.  Patti, tell us a little more about that.

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Sure, I’d be really happy to, because I think this will make a huge difference if our listeners can get this, and it’s actually so easy for most people to get this.  Most people live, for very good reason, in a place which I call “dis-integration.”  Which just means that their mind is usually dominant, and they had to do that starting in about kindergarten and on up.  So that their mind, they do have a mind, an emotional brain, and a physical brain, and a sexual center.  And usually these different centers of intelligence  often are in battle for each other.  For example, you meet someone, and one part of you is saying, “Well, I really shouldn’t sleep with him on the first date.  Let’s build some emotional bonds together.”  Then the part of you, in your heart, is going, “Oh man, I really love this person, I know I can trust him, the time is right.”  Your physical brain is going, “Well, I’m just really in the mood, let’s have it.”  Your spiritual center is going, “I can attract whatever I want into my life.”  And some other part of you is going, “What about safe sex?”  So all these parts of you are at war with one another, and you don’t get a consistent message.  So that is a place where we live most of our lives, in a place of dis-integration.  So the opposite would be integration.  There are different ways to integrate.  A really simple way would be to just take a grounding breath, and to breathe up, and just to visualize as you were breathing up that you were connecting your sex center, your power center, your heart, and your mind.  As you breathe up and out the top of your head, and then let that go out the top and then breathe down and out and through, and letting all of that go out.  Do that a few times and start a wave with yourself, until you can begin to feel that you are just one whole being.  Just allow yourself to go into integration.  And oddly enough your heart actually has the strongest wavelength in the body.

Francesca Gentille:   What do you mean by wavelength?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Your heart is actually emitting a wavelength, a frequency. 
Francesca Gentille:   So you could see it in [indecipherable]? In school it would be a oscilloscope, I think, that you can see the frequency of things?

 

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Yes, or on an EEG.  Yes, you could.  And then you will then train your brain will follow suit, and so what happens then is you become integrated.  And then you can think from a place of integration.  Your whole being shifts.  And then what would happen is you would begin to have a thought that was integrated, like “Well I’m going to sit down and really share how I feel with this person.”  Well when you can begin to think like that, then the way you touch someone changes.  And the way you feel changes, and the way you experience their touch feels.  And now you’re getting into sacred sexuality, the way the Tantricas wanted you to do it, because you’re not in your ego brain anymore.  You’re not having ego sex anymore.  You’re having transpersonal sex.  You are leaving the ego.  You are going into an integrated whole being, the way you feel.  So if your listeners wanted to go home, they could try grounding together.  There are lots of other ways of doing it, but they could just try grounding, and just touching.

Francesca Gentille:   What is, when you say grounding, does that mean that they sit on the ground?  Or does that mean…?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Well no, they would just stand, and do these breaths, maybe in a relaxed position, and visualize their breath going up through the sky and then pulling down grounding energy down through the earth and then go into a wave so they are just visualizing themselves as whole beings, a unified integrated being.

Francesca Gentille:   So when we are talking about grounding, what I am hearing is that we are really using the visual capabilities of our mind, that we all can hear about in movies like “What the Bleep Do We Know?” or “The Secret.”  It’s the capacity for the mind to shift our reality. 

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Well, what you’re…

Francesca Gentille:   We’re also thinking about perhaps deepening our breath, or lengthening our breath, something like that.  You mentioned breathing down, starting the breath, imagining that it was starting down at the sex center, which is near our genitals, right?  So as if our genitals could start to breathe, and then our power center would be right around our belly.  So breathing down from our genitals, and then up to our belly, and then up into our heart, and then up into our brain, and then really up to the very top of our heads, so having that, is that what you’re saying is a grounding breath?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Well what it is it is grounding because it is actually a centering breath.  And what you are doing you are pulling a breath all the way up from the ground, through your being, through your spine, up through the top of your head, and then you are pulling more breath down through you and letting it go.  And you are actually just allowing yourself to re-center  in a wholeness.  This is like a path of full engagement.  And so you are reorienting yourself away from brain dominance to a dominance where what rules you is that you are a centered, energetic being, where before you were brain dominant.  Now what is true is you feel when you do this, and all you have to do is breathe, and it’s about awareness of all of you.  And when you do this, you can feel the blood rushing in your teeth, you can feel the smile in your ears, you can feel your feet standing on the ground, you can begin to feel yourself everywhere.  And you go, “that’s right, I’m a whole person.  I’m not the person that got cut off on the freeway.  I’m not my problems with my bills.  I’m right here, right now, I’m breathing, I’m alive.  Your focus shifts, and you are this very present, very aware person. You become so juicy, and wonderful, and alive, and amazing, because you’re very centered and you’re full.  You are your heart and your love.  And you are your mind, you don’t drop your mind at all.  You’re so lucid and aware, and sexually alive and powerful.  It’s like you have brought it all to operate together.

Francesca Gentille:   This is a very easy thing that people can do any time, and definitely with their beloved when they first come home, just bring that awareness, that to the earth to imagine as you were saying, to imagine that they can bring up from the earth and down from the sky and the heavens.  And you’ve studied this, right?  You’ve actually studied the physiology of this.  What happens in the brain, and what happens in the body, when we are imagining that we can breathe up from the earth and down from the heavens,  and we’re starting to be aware of everything in our whole body, does our brain shift?  Is there a way if we were hooked up to electrodes, would it show this?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Well people have been doing this for thousands of years, so history shows that this is very powerful stuff.  And probably it’s kind of hard to measure, because people move.  I’m guessing that when you go into enlightened states of being you would go into kind of Alpha.  No, I don’t think you could, I think you would be activating all kinds of brain waves in different moments.  But I do know this, that when you touch someone from in this place, that it is very infectious.  Remember that I said that your heart is actually the most powerful frequency?  When you do these kinds of centering breaths, and you only need to do a few, you will then train your body, and when you can touch somebody from this place, you will then train them too.  So if you want to have an amazing connection, just do this before you touch them. 

Francesca Gentille:   To breathe like this…

Dr. Patti Taylor:   And you will bliss them out.  I got into teaching this, because I do teach expanded orgasm, and when someone touches their partner to give them an expanded orgasm, and they’ve been all stressed out all day.  Because let’s face it, not everyone is in a poocha, or a ritual or ceremony, where most of us are coming home from a day of work, and we still want to give our partner sacred bliss.  If you can learn how to bring in this very sacred energy in an hour, or in five minutes, then your touch is melty, and soft and springy and alive.  Everything you do is infused with this magic and this energy.  And it’s catchy!  Your partner will be that way back to you as well.

Francesca Gentille:   I want to talk more about how we catch this from each other, and how we sync up with each other, and more about what in training is, that’s a very fascinating word, when we come back from a word from our sponsors, with Dr. Patti Taylor, Expanded Orgasm Coach, the woman who teaches people how to make love.

[commercial break]

[music]

Francesca Gentille:   Welcome back to Sex, Tantra and Kama Sutra, with Dr. Patti Taylor, who 20 years ago had the powerful kundalini experience that transformed and awakened her life, and brought her ultimately to us today--we are so lucky!--to talk about expanded orgasm, and we were just talking about entraining, and I was just asking Patti to give us a little bit more information about what entraining is and maybe even an example that you yourself saw or experienced with a couple.

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Ok, sure.  Well, what entraining is, is brains are very, well, they are very malleable.  We have something called mirror neurons in our brain.  So we learn by empathy.  This is very new research.  And that’s a part of the way that we evolve.  So if I see you do something, I will copy you.  And so one of the things they found out, is that the person who has the strongest brain waves is the one that will be copied.  So, if I am emitting the most love, for example, and I am next to you, or not necessarily the most love, but if I am emitting the most coherence, which means that my brain waves are lined up with my heart, and my power center, and my sexual center, I have a very strong, coherent set of waves, or frequency.  Now, you come into my field.  You are going to line up with me.  It’s pretty clear.  And great salesmen know this, and great charismatics.  That’s what charisma is.  It’s someone who is very coherent.  But you can use this in your lovelife, just by being coherent.  I’ll give you some examples.  I gave you the one about using the grounding, just to be lined up, or find your center.  There are some other ones too.  If you know how to just relax into what I call an active state of relaxation, this is something that I teach people, but a lot of people know how to do it on their own.  You go into a something of a mild vibratory state.  We all have this sort of natural vibratory state as an alternative to our still state.  We are born in a state of orgasmic vibration.  And I teach this to people in a circle.  And they can go home and do this, usually, if they don‘t do it on the first try.  But people can vibrate.  And they will do it often when they are just sort of shivering or shaking when they are really close to their partner.  And if they are vibratory…

Francesca Gentille:   I want to vibrate!  I want to vibrate!  How can I vibrate with you right now?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   [makes vibrating sound]  It’s a matter of allowing.  Just sitting and opening yourself to the wind and ahhh…. [makes vibrating sound].  Oh you just feel everything!  [makes vibrating sound]  It feels so good!  The thing is, with me doing this, you want to do it too, because I’ve got good vibes.  Well, that’s entrainment.  That’s my point.  So if you understand entrainment, you can be a very sexy babe, or a guy.  And lots of guys, lots of people know this, and that’s how they’re so sexy.  Because people want to entrain.

Francesca Gentille:   And that vibratory state, is it anything similar to having an orgasm itself?  When I orgasm, I go into some waves of vibration.

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Totally!  In fact, absolutely.  What an orgasm is, is a series of contractions, autonomic contractions.  They can be labial, they can be uterine, they can be abdominal, they can be anywhere in the body.  Then if you look at chi gong they teach contractive states.  But you can just be vibratory because you’re singing out loud!  How about when you’re chanting mantras?  You can just be laughing and contracting your head off!  Vibration is just a celebration, or it can be really subtle and wonderful.  We open ourselves up to movement and motion, and of course just orgasmic states.  We teach something, actually, which is called “sweet rocking,” which is how to induce an orgasmic state through a certain kind of rocking which will induce an orgasm or an orgasmic state.

Francesca Gentille:   Just with rocking?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   It’s called “sweet rocking.”  We invented the term.  You can just touch someone’s neck, really gently, you have to maybe do it a couple of times--and I’ll tell your listeners how to do it, in a moment, and what to try at home--and put them into an orgasm this way.  But if you want to try this at home, what I would suggest is kneel in front of your partner.  I would work with their pelvic hip bone, and just really gently. You have to get into the same system as they are, the same energy.  The giver and the receiver both want to feel what the receiver is feeling.  You want to just rock and just feel each other feeling each other.  You want to sort of send a really sweet little vibrational pulse through the other person.  You want to feel their pleasure.  You can start to send a ripple through them.  It’s really subtle.  But it can be so pleasureable!  Oh my goodness!  I think this is what those Tantricas were doing when they were doing their practices.  Because expanded orgasm is just a lot of practices for bringing people into this transcendent pleasure.  And we’re doing it today!  It’s very easy to understand, and it’s very bonding.

Francesca Gentille:   Yes, we are.  Since we’ve been talking about it, I’m breathing a little deeper.  I’m sitting on my black leather couch here at home, and I can imagine, and I’m actually starting to do it, just tilting my pelvic girdle back and forth, my pelvis, back and forth.  That feels really nice!  [laughs]

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Well you know, it’s a very bonding thing to do, because everyone is so short on time these days.  A half an hour to do some expanded orgasm practices, you bond together, you relax, you do some deep breathing, you do some sweet rocking, you connect, you’re intimate, maybe you’re aerobic.  I think it’s a great practice to take up, you can do it well into your old age.  You have the golden youth glow around you.  We love it!

Francesca Gentille:   What are some of the outcomes?  You started to mention them, and you’ve tantalized me now.  Are there the same outcomes for men and for women if they are practicing expanded orgasm?  And I just want to say one thing about the video, a little plug for the video: I actually suggested your DVD to a woman who had not experienced an orgasm in years.  She’d gone through peri-menopause, she’d come out the other side with a very depleted libido.  I said, “Try this video, it’s so good.”  She brought it home and she emailed me ecstatically within a week, saying it was just one of the hottest things that she’d ever seen!  That it really gave she and her husband great information, very specific how-to tips on how to touch and be touched, especially how to have him touch her, and that she was experiencing her orgasms again, and she was so excited!

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Well thank you, and it’s all about the love, so I’m really touched.  That‘s “Expand Your Orgasm Tonight,” so thank you, I’m really touched.

Francesca Gentille:   [laughs]  I don’t think I’d ever shared that little story with you.

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Well thank you, I did do that to really let people know that there are ways. Because this is about connection.  So thank you.  So the outcomes, for people who practice this.  Is that your question?

Francesca Gentille:   Yes, the outcomes for men and for women, are they the same?  Are they different?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   You know, there are so many different outcomes.  This is a practice, particularly the way I teach it, that it has a lot of different facets to it.  I think that it requires that people have a lot of communication.  So I think that’s one thing.  And of course that’s very intimate.  So actually, if you’re going to do this, you’re really going to have to--and I think what expanded orgasm is, it’s a microcosm of the macrocosm--so if you’re not ready to have communication in your whole relationship, if you’re like “Well man, I can’t handle that, that’s just biting off a giant piece of cake” then you can just start with expanded orgasm and say well, that’s it.  Ok, I’ve got it, maybe it’s sex, and maybe that’s a little chargy, but it’s one small little thing.  And the whole world will show up in that one practice.  So you can just start there.  And you will uncover communication just in that one hour, that you set aside, and it will be so intimate, and so profound, and so beautiful that you took some risks, if you can learn how to navigate.  And for the man, he can learn a lot about how to pleasure himself.  Men can certainly have expanded orgasms too.  And they can learn how to run energy up and down their bodies and how to last a lot longer.  And I think for me that’s been a great benefit, is that I don’t feel nearly as pressured to actually have sex, because I know that my guy can take care of himself and  I can just sit there next to him and so he can have a good time and I can watch.  It’s actually taken the pressure off of me to be anything sexual because there is so much freedom and openness now, when there is so much surplus and abundance.

Francesca Gentille:   The whole body becomes sexual.  All of life becomes sexual.

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Right, and when my partner makes me an offer, I say “Yes!”  Because it’s not like I’m getting the same offer to go down and have hotdogs and beans for the hundredth millionth time.  I’m getting the offer to have Tom Cruise and ten of his favorite movie star actors come over for the best night of my life, every time I get an offer.  So we live in a world, from my point of view, which is incredibly joyful, and where it just keeps getting better and better all the time.  So I would say the pleasure grows, it changes the communication.  Sometimes it’s about the communication, sometimes it’s about dropping the ego.  It’s very spiritual, it’s very meditative.  It really can be about dropping the ego, we’ve had a thousand of those.  [laughs]

Francesca Gentille:   Patti, I want to talk more about some of these things, the intimate communication, the running of the energy, the dropping of the ego, after a few words from our sponsor. 

Dr. Patti Taylor:  Ok.

Francesca Gentille:   We’ll be coming back with Dr. Patti Taylor, the expert who teaches people how to make love, the author of “Expanded Orgasm,” after this break.

[commercial break]

[music]

Francesca Gentille:   Welcome back to “Sex, Tantra and Kama Sutra,” bringing you the “Soul of Sex” with our special guest, Dr. Patti Taylor, author of “Expanded Lovemaking” and Tantrica extraordinaire.  Welcome back, Patti.

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Hi, Francesca.

Francesca Gentille:   Hi!  I know we are starting to come to the close of our show, but I have a question I’m burning to ask about that intimate communication.  What would you say to your lover, so this is your lover who is here in front of you, and you are wanting to create that soulful intimate connection, and yet that soulfully hot connection, what would you say?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   To create that woefully hot..

Francesca Gentille:  Soulfully hot connection.

Dr. Patti Taylor:   [laughs]  I would probably say something like this.  Before we ever got started, I would say, “You know, lover boy, I happen to have a passion for saying exactly what’s on my mind.  That just turns me on just so much when I can just tell you everything that’s on my mind.  Oh my god, that makes me so hot, so wet!  Oh!  I mean, I have a big mouth [laughs], I just, oh, does it get me wet, when I can just say everything!  But of course I want you to tell me everything that’s on your mind too, oh that gets me just as hot and just as wet!  Would you be ok with me kind of ranting that way?”  And I would probably say this, probably minus the Southern accent [laughs], I would probably say something like that as soon as possible before we ever really got started.  And I have never met a guy yet that didn’t just say “Yes!”  And that’s it, I’ve got them to go along, and then I just train them that this is a good thing.  And then the minute I want something, I ask for it, especially in the beginning, I say, “Oh, do this, do that”  or whatever, and then they do it because now they’ve got it that it’s a great idea.  I say “Oh God, that was great, thank you, more, more, more!  Oh God that was great, thank you!”  Then suddenly they’ve got it in their brain, “Hey this is great!  Where have you been my whole life?  This is the way!”  And that’s that.

Francesca Gentille:  I love that.  And actually I do practice that.  Letting a man know that if I’m talking to him and he’s talking to me, that’s going to get me wet.  That is…I agree, it’s so inspiring, I love that you brought that up, and also the appreciating.  What can a man say to a woman that will inspire her?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   What can a man say…?

Francesca Gentille:  We can say, “Oh, it would be so hot to spend some time talking to you, or to tell you everything on my mind, or to hear what’s on your mind, that would get me hot.”  What can a man say that’s really going to inspire a woman to be connected, to get in bed with him, to have divine sex with him.  What is something he can say or do?

Dr. Patti Taylor:   I kind of believe that different women are going to want to hear different things, so, I think that men aren’t necessarily as good at this all the time as women.  I know what I would do for myself.  I would help my guy out.  So I gave my man a script.  “Here, these are the things that I want you to say.  These are the things that you have said that are really good, you can say these all the time!  These are on my A list, these are on my B list.”  For me, I happen to like acts of service.  So a guy comes home, I don’t want to talk.  I want to have my head massaged, I want to have my feet massaged, I want to have this, I want to have that.  I want someone to be physical with me before I have any discussion whatsoever.  Because that’s what works for me.  It could be completely different for somebody else.  Oh, and I want them to ground first, so that when they touch me it’s from a nice, centered, aligned place.  I don’t want them to have a traffic report in their hands, I want it to be really yummy and grounded.  So that’s what I’ve asked for.  And they know exactly what to do to win with me.  And I do encourage every woman to help her guy out.  Let him know.  Because every man wants to know the age old question of what a woman wants.  And women, just go right in there.  It’s not cheating if you tell him.  Tell him.  He will love you for it.

Francesca Gentille:  Thank you, Patti, so much for those wonderful, empowering tips for men and for women.  To let women know to take back their power of letting a man know what they want, and for men to take back their power in really giving fully to a woman.  They do, they want to give.  They want to give and know that what they give is going to be celebrated.  And you can hear more of Dr. Patti Taylor, more about her, more from her. You can get more about her at www.expandedlovemaking.com and you can hear more from her because she is also a host on our Personal Life Media Network with her own show, “Expanded Lovemaking.”  Thank you so much for joining us today, Patti.

Dr. Patti Taylor:   Oh, it’s been so great.  Thanks for having me, Francesca.

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