Episode 30: Up, Up and Over

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Join guest host Robert Kandell for a turned-on night of erotic poetry recorded live at OneTaste Urban Retreat Center in San Francisco. Prepare to be turned on and inspired by these sensual poets who share their most intimate and sensual experiences.

First up to the mic is sultry Stephanie describing an erotic encounter that is guaranteed to excite and entice. Listen as Stephanie describes her fantasy turned reality, step by step, leaving nothing to the imagination.

Next up is Lauren serenading the crowd with her own personal style of sensual song. 'Limbic lover' will take you up, up, and over.

Yia shares an intimate and shocking revelation with us in the piece 'Women Want Sex.' Witness the desire of a fully empowered and turned on woman and learn a little something about what women really want.

Carmen pours her broken heart into a beautiful song that shows us the vulnerability and passion of love lost. 'Get O' Will' get your heart and soul going in tune with the beat of a lover's heart.

Cheryl lays it on us for real with the no holds barred piece 'I Want To Be a Woman...'See into the dreams and desires of an impassioned woman who knows what she wants.

Last up is our host Robert with an improvisational piece called 'Orasmic Rerrorist'. Laugh and sigh along with him as he shares his fanatical fantasy of world domination through orgasm.

This episode of erotic open mic is filled with a little bit of everything; music, comedy, improvisation and a whole lot more. Tune in and you are bound to find somethin right up your alley.

Transcript

Robert Kandell: Hello everyone, my name is Rob Kandell subbing for the lovely yet absent Marcie Prohofsky here at San Francisco One Taste.  This is Erotic Open Mic Night, as part of the Personal Life Media network in San Francisco we have a center in Soma, south of Market, and what we do here is many things.  We have a center full of people.  We run courses, we have events, we do yoga, we do massage, and one thing that’s coming up currently, is we have this new course called  The Body Course and we spent a couple hours working on it and talking about it today and this great view point came up; that your body, this is my interpretation this is not official one taste   lingo, your body is your interface to the world and how you relate to your body is how you relate    to your world.   And so, here at Open Mic Night we are gonna have many people come up and do some improvisation.  We’re gonna have some music.  We’re gonna have some people come up and just kinda present their viewpoints about their body and how they relate to the world. So we’re very excited.  For shows like this and other wonderful things you can check us out at personallifemedia.com and without me babbling anymore let’s get started.  First up improvisation: the lovely yet dangerous Stephanie.

Stephanie: So I lied a little bit, it’s half improve half stuff I wrote yesterday.  Come over here let me   whisper in your ear the things I wanna do to you.  The way I wanna touch your body and tell you ‘girl, your such a hottie‘.  You’ll bat your eye as if  your shy cuz you’re really Bi and scared of how much you really like the touch of a seductive woman.  But believe me, I’ll navigate your resistance with my seductive persistence.  I’ll have you in my bed while I massage your head. You’ll be asking me touch your nipples and  I will trail my hand down to the bottom of your body. And then you’ll say I have to go, my car is parked outside and they are doing a street cleaning at midnight.  So we have 20 minutes; and ill take off my clothes and I’ll leave on my underwear cuz that’s hot and then you’ll look at my pussy and you’ll just start touching it and then off come the underwear.  And we have 15 minutes, and you’ll stick your hand in my pussy, your fingers, and you’ll pretend like you’re a bad girl but in your case you’re really a gentle soul, and we have 10 minutes left and you’ve actually changed my perspective on Bi girls cuz usually they don’t know what they’re doing but you know how to massage the pussy and we have 5 minutes left.  And you   take me up to the top the very very very top and then you say you have to go.   And you leave.  So I hop in bed with the girl and boy next door and make out with her while she gets fucked, and that’s my night.

Robert Kandell:  What can we learn from this experience?  Move the car before the make out.  Move the car   before the make out!  Whew!  Alright Bob, you wanna go next?  Ok, Lauren’s gonna come up, doing a song called Limbic Lover.

Lauren: So this is pretty fresh off the press.  I might pause a moment for word remembrance.  Somewhere down on McAlister approached his fingers stroking the world promiscuous mischievous light in his eye. The doorbell rings, he has a arrived he rocks me with his arrogance, I feel unactualized            intelligence the layers peel off two by two.  I’m so turned on my the core of you.  Limbic lover labia licker come on over so we can go over to the place where the moment takes us arriving nowhere and nowhere to be.  Electricity, synchronicity, lip locked tongue tied fire ignites.  You’ll remember how I quiver the moment that your breath meats mine.  Cockadoodle, so bamboozled pinch my nipple double tuble trickle rickle ripple you climb up to a precipice ashes to ashes we cease to exist.  Limbic lover, labia licker come on over so we can go over to the place where the moment takes us arriving no where an no where to be.  Your dick near my clit slurps the goo of  me, jacks bean stalk elongating.  A play of power saliva shower.  Engorged contrite flower milks the top of coital tower.  I should really call that woman back about the yoga class later.  I wonder what I’m gonna eat for dinner tonight  maybe we should go to that new Thai  restaurant  right down the street on Fillmore.  I miss Thailand.  Get out of your head he says to me.  Breathe into your pussy.  My heart thumps in and out my heart thumps to a tambala beat.  Nipples harden pinched up feet breath of fire ongelating oh how many moments till we peak?  My spleen beats in and out sink of beats.   Hips gyrate eyes dilate the fate of the moment oscillates and then you stroke that G our souls go wee.  Limbic lover, labia licker come on over so we can go over, find the edge and kiss the ledge dissolve into a puddle cuddle spoon of honey love and dreams.  Thank you, thank you .

Robert Kandell:  Looking for volunteers?  How you doing tonight.  How you doing tonight?  Yea alright.  Labia lover lick something .  Yes, whatever you said, Yes sign me up for that program. Ok next  up, hey you ready?  Are you ready, are you ready to knock their socks off?  Fantastic.  Alright, coming up with the shocking title Women Want Sex , wait is this men want sex? Wait let me check   my paper here.  Oh it does say, women want sex. Here’s the lovely Yia.

Yia:  Thank you.  Women want sex.  It’s not like I think about it all the time or want it all the time in fact there are times when I don’t even notice it, it being the sex.  And before I know it its been two weeks and I haven’t had  sex.  And its been two weeks and I haven’t felt good in my body except in ohms and people start to look weird and hungry and needy and clinging and I want to get away   from everyone.  In the midst of it I’m wondering what’s going on with me why am I easily agitated, irritated and annoyed.  Why in the middle of the night am I laying next to a body and I feel stiff and uncomfortable and neutral the thought or need or hunger for sex is numb and I cant even feel it.  I look at the men and I’m not attracted to any one of them .  Not a one.  They’re just bodies passing by that I’m living with and that I’m calculating to see if he can help me with this or that. I’m wrapped up in production world of getting things done and at  the same time not getting enough done.  I look at the women and feel an attraction there here and there but don’t wanna go in there because I’m awkward about my lesbian side and I make them the enemy and run the story of  how I don’t fit in with them and don’t wanna get involved in all of the dramas.  So I play the same role perhaps even more so of the mediocre melodramatic broken wing bird instead of stepping up to my turn on and power and women hood and instead enroll them in to buy in to my drama of giving them candy.  So two weeks have gone by and here I am with a meek outlook in this bright world and people in connection all around me and I hide not coming out then something happens    and hook up with someone and I’m kissing him and feeling his body, his hands on my body, on my breasts, yes their still there.  My ass, my thighs, my pussy, yes, my pussy and she’s there and she’s      alive and he’s stroking me and suddenly this hunger rises up and she is thirsty and she wants to eat and devour and ill guide his cock in me and at that first penetration she’s a bit tight but it feels good and as he keeps moving in and out of me before I know it I want him in me faster and deeper and my pussy starts to expand and water ripples throughout my body and ignites each cell and expands.  And my body engorges and explodes and light ripples throughout my body.  I catch my breath and rest and peer out at the world and the colors are brighter shades of red, green, blue, and yellow.  I can see, the glass is wiped clean, the pipes cleared out, my body is satiated, my pussy alive again and everyone is my friend and I feel so alive and connected.  This is pleasure this is life.  So, yea, of course why wouldn’t women want sex?
               
Robert Kandell:  It’s kind of like a revivalist tint.  Rise up and I can see, I’ve had sex!  The crowd goes silent on that one.  Breathe, everyone breathe.  Ok, we’re gonna take a quick break and we’ll see you back in five minutes.

Break

Robert Kandell:  With the cool boots, next up, the lovely talented and dangerous Carmen.

Carmen:  Thank you you’re right about the dangerous part.

Robert Kandell:  Yes I know you’re dangerous Id like to know how dangerous to be honest but we’ll go from here.

Carmen:  Thanks for the consciousness I don’t need eyes they’re like Carmen right there and I’m like oh thanks good thing I was walking with my eyes closed.  Ok I’m gonna just play something for you guys because there’s an opportunity to share.  This song’s called get go.  Its kind of erotic.  Saliva            caught in the back of my throat only if I could choke down what you said to me today aint got no season to reinforce your reason on why think my love would just waste you away.  My life right now is like smoking an empty pipe, let the light on your lips as you inhale what don’t exist can my life get much more hopeless that this I don’t know maybe I should wait till tomorrow.  So now what you gonna do when she don’t come for you lord knows no kinda love is going to save you.    Just wish that I had some thing better to do than to sit around thinking bout where I went wrong with you.  Oh what I’ve seen is life can be so clean it brings you to the right spot at the right time but, only when your not searching for it.  I threw out my rope, you produce no hope.  Oh you just, oh you just, oh you just, you just choke my hope and when I pull back you let go you let go from    the grip you didn’t have from the get go I’m so glad, I’m so glad, I’m so glad that I let go.  So now what you gonna do when she don’t come for you lord knows no kinda love is going to save you.   Just wish that I had some thing better to do than to sit around thinking bout where I went wrong with you.  You must been wrong from the get go.  I’m so glad that I let go.  So, now what you gonna do when I don’t come for you, I know my love is not going to save you and I’m glad that I had nothing better to do than sit around writing this little ole song for you.  Saliva caught in the back of my throat only if I could choke down what you said to me today.  Aint got no season to reinforce your reason on why I think my love would just waste you away. It wont.  Thank you.

Robert Kandell:  That’s why we’re groupies.  That’s why we’re last league of magic groupies right there.     Now you know why.

Unknown:  That’s one sixth of the reason

Robert Kandell:  One sixth of the reason.  Wait, sounds like a basket ball team or something with a sub.  Alright, Cheryl, you got something.  Ok, coming up Cheryl’s going to do something very cool, sexy, hot and here’s Cheryl.

Cheryl:  Hmm, one taste you have once again totally like confronted me and scared me and made me squirm   in my seat with your openness.  So When I grow up I wanna be a woman and not a woman as defined by my perfectly perky peach shaped breasts plump bottom or well tailored slice of heaven       down below.  I wanna be that woman who lies on a red velvet couch and whose face and body exist in complete congruence with her soul, symbolizing love, sweat, and hardship and comforting brilliance for mesmerized eyes.  I wanna be a woman writer who writes her story of evolution from baby pink to hot pink across the entire earth sky using the atmosphere as her canvas rainbows as her palate and an evergreen tree her paintbrush sitting on rooftops of airplanes purging her life on   to the surface of the sky.  And every child that is born will be provided with a passport as their birthright and will be born to the chapter one and every birthday there after families will travel to  the next city to read the next chapter in the sky and by the time each child has graduated high school they will be around the world and back again having read their first auto biography and will set out to write their own.  And I wanna be a woman whose man lives to lead her in dance who accepts love and partnership as gracefully as she provides it, and  as a result ill be a mom I want my stomach to swell with the creation of life stretch marks plotting my c section my thighs swelling to provide a nest like lap for my babies and I will feed them with oceans of wisdom laden breast milk and raise them to feed the world.  To honor and respect others beginning with honor and respect for themselves and their life’s mission will be to fulfill on the integrity of the planet however it is that they see fit to do so.  And I know that I have not yet begun to define the being of woman.  She’s responsible for the world she cries for the world she picks up the pieces of the world and is the glue and understanding that binds them together she’s electric.  One swift swipe down the center of her back and her wings blossom like ripening flower pedals and she’s not afraid    to show it with class.  And I have no idea what woman is, I only know by the glimpses that I get because every woman that I see, I watch and admire.  And I steal their steady eye contact, their shoulder movements, their walks, and their laughs so that when I grow up I will be a wondrous collage of every woman that I have ever studied and at the climax of my growth I wannna die.  But, I wanna die differently, not from cancer or a car crash.  I wanna die from exhaustion, I wanna     feel the earth rotate a little bit off course.  My vision splitting everything into three’s and dying over takes me when I’ve exhausted every word  in every language and when my skin is tingling because it doesn’t know whether to keep the blood from falling out of my body or to lie down next to me.  I’ll be so tired that my skin will have forgotten how to do its job.  When I grow up, I wanna   be a woman.  So exhausted that I have earned my eternal sleep just like every mother, woman, daughter, sister, lover, friend.  We all wish we had pulling for us.

Robert Kandell:  You wanna run some laps?  You know, run some laps around the track maybe get all tired and stuff.  Run around the laps get you tired, you know, if you need any help with that there’s plenty of volunteers here we can help you with that.

Robert Kandell:  Yes, that’s exactly what I was doing.  I’m a little shy.  I didn’t wanna come out and right say it, but my god that was good.  So, we’re gonna do one more.  Some other clown’s gonna do a little improv that would be me and this is called orgasmic terrorist and I’m gonna make this up on         the fly.  We ask the same question every time, what would you do if you were chosen as a messenger of orgasm and I said last week.  I would be an orgasmic terrorist.  I would take over the   radio stations I would take over the TVs.  I’d wear a bandana and you can call me Heffy, Heffy-o is what you can call me.  I have a Bandera of a different sort I would organize a band of very dangerous terrorists that would infiltrate the government the school systems and the catholic church . People would bow down they’d say oh Heffy, oh Heffy, please don’t take my life I will also join your berry band of orgasmic terrorists  I will help you take over this world because you know what here’s what I have to say about  this particular thing I don’t think this world is working   out all that well there’s divorce theirs petulance there’s this thing called McDonalds. Yhese are very bad things we need to change some things.  We need to take over the government because the government is leading us astray. They are leading us into these little boxes they call homes.  They         are selling us refrigerators. They are selling us microwaves.  They’re selling us TIVO.  TIVO  Lets think about TIVO for a second. TIVO allows you to record one television show while you’re watching another.  This is the wrong direction.  We need books.  We need sex.  We need to get out of these clothes and get in between the sheets, and we need to find out what it takes to take this finger, connect it to that genitalia, and see what we can create.  So for our orgasmic terrorist thing we need a slogan.  Make love not war.  No, that didn’t work out very well.  Should we call it have sex and   not do politics?  No, no, no, lets see…  Instead of filing taxes we must file a special order of magnitude where you must have sex at least once a day.  That’s right, no more of these two weeks without sex.  No more of these questions about what can a woman become.  We’re going to create a revolution.  A revolution of orgasmic messengers.  All coming together to change the world, and they’ll remember my name in history books.   They’ll sing my name in the low lands.  They’ll sing, oh Heffy, oh Heffy, you changed the world.  And I’ll say “yes I did”. And I’ll die.  Probably be assassinated. Definitely be assassinated.  They’ll take me out.  There will be some right wing republican guy who lost his job because of me and hell take me out in the middle of the night with a night scope.  And some paramilitary secret seal guy take me out, but that will be a fine   way to die. And for that ladies and gentlemen, I salute you and bid you a good eve.  Woo!  FAO.  Yes.  Alright.  Any last burners?  Mary?  No.  Ok.  So, this has been Erotic Open Mic Night night here at One Taste in San Francisco.  My name is Rob Kendall.  Abusing the mic for the last hour. For shows like this and other wonderful things, please check out personallifemedia.com.  That’s personallifemedia.com.  You can also check out our website at onetaste.us