Episode 35 - When I Look At You

Transcript

This program is intended for mature audiences only.

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Marcie Prohofsky: Welcome to a taste of erotic of poetry reading. My name is Marcie Prohofsky. Today’s show is recorded live at one taste in San Francisco. You will be hearing pros and poetry from people who are totally willing to share their intimate experiences with you. Anticipate turn on and even inspiration. Here’s a taste from today’s show.

“My skin calls out for your touch, longing, yearning for the warmth of your hands and the pressure of your body on top of me “

Rob: “I swear it’s just this feeling that you just wanna shoved down inside your body. Don’t want to know what it feels like to actually be out of control…”

“But how I feel when he sees me like this, open and vulnerable without me being able to hide it.”

My name is Marcie Prohofsky and thank you all for being here. We’ve been here doing these shows for a little over a year and they just continue to get hotter. Okay, so let’s get started with Rob, a hot improv no doubt by Rob. This is a piece called desire.

Rob: My name is Robert and this is improvisation, else I wanna warn you all I’m having a feeling today, just one feeling, that’s enough. So this one is called desire. A good friend of mine said it was time for you, me to unlock my desire so this is an improvisation about it.

Desire is the settled monster hiding behind your closet. The door you can hear him creaking. The light coming from behind it. You can even smell him, that small little monster of desire. But no, let’s close the closet, and let’s hold our back to it, maybe lean against it, maybe I’ll pile the laundry on top of it coz we do not want to feel that dangerous feeling of desire. We don’t want to feel what’s happening in our bodies when we face it. And so what we do and we have our days and we have our nights, and everyone tonight were lying in bed you know you’re lying in bed and you can hear the tip tap of the water and you think I should get up and fix the water faucet but no this is worst this is the loud growling of desire and its behind the closet, behind the laundry pile, and perhaps a chair you stack you think it might block you from desire but no in the middle of the night you’re thinking about of that one little thing you didn’t say that one little cheeseburger that you did not eat, that one little girl you did not flirt with no it is that always there thinking wanting feeling. But we’re all very nice socially acceptable people. We don’t want to let this little monster out. Desire is for those other people, those hedonistic people who want their sex orgies and roaming and feeling and feast in flesh and no its not for us its its for people with no self control its for people with no morals I swear it’s just this feeling that you just wanna shoved down inside your body. Don’t want to know what it feels like to actually be out of control when it comes to sex and desire, lust, food, money, power, you just want to lock it behind that closet. So what you’re gonna do? You’re gonna actually probably move out of that house and go to different state. Is that what you’re thinking about? But no, you always know that monster that monster desire has very special passport, a very special visa and when you move in to the new house and you have to find your closet and guess what’s it gonna be right there waiting for you. Thank you.

Marcie Prohofsky : I kept waiting for you to talk about like the urge to go pee when your bed’s so comfortable and in the middle of the night you don’t really want to get up and you just pretend it just gonna walk away and it just continues to knock on the door. Okay, uh alright let’s see who’s gonna knock on the door next. Fred, with your piece “When I Look at you.”

Fred: There you sit, your face bathed in the soft afternoon sun.
Young beautiful center of the universe. Oblivious to my presence and thoroughly absorbed in yourself. The radiance of your youthful skin takes my breath away. Your features yet to show the ravages of age taunt me with the gravity-defined perfection. Your hair possesses the effortless beauty of shine and bounce of youth. Your pores are tight your skin flawless. Your teeth are perfect. You are perfect and the world loves you. But when I look at you I don’t see perfection I see ugliness when I look at you I see pain. When I look at you I see fear. When I look at you I see pettiness. When I look at you I see a person who wishes it could all be different. When I look at you I see deep lines in your unblemished face, I see sagging skin where your skin is taut and perfect. I see eyes starting to dull with age yet crying out “I’m not old yet goddamit”, I see a body starting to break down though yours isn’t even out of warranty. When I look at you I don’t see a beautiful young woman with the world at your feet and the future filled with promise I see an old man whose best days are to be said to be long ago when he was your age. I don’t see possibility in power I see failure in chain. I do apologize its not you it’s me. I just got some synaptic wiring real problem sub minor defects really. You’re so beautiful so alluring so sexy that you push every button I have and  you send me to a place where I’m blind deaf and dumb and I lived not in a moment not in reality but in my head and in a lie I made up both long ago and just now. You became an actor in my play. Your part scripted long ago by people you’ll never meet in a play for which you never auditioned but you do play your part well. You bludgeon me with my flaws, you taunt me with your perfection in my now conspicuous imperfection you show me everything that’s wrong with me mock me open all my wounds make hurt make me cry make me beg please please make me feel young and beautiful even if only for an instant allow me the illusion for one fuckin’ moment that I’m young and beautiful that I’m your equal, that I’m you. I don’t care if it’s a lie I just want to believe it. For one moment can I please not be an old fuckin’ man. Ah if only u could’ve seen me when I was your age I was something confident a six pack, I use to fuck women like you all the time but now you’re everything and I’m a has been which to you like all men is never was like all old men is never was. You make me a failure you exposed me you make me want what I didn’t before. Suddenly I wish I was 20 years younger and the moment I saw you I went from being complete to being a total loser even though you never even looked up from your book. They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness. You see when I look at you I don’t see your beauty I see my ugliness. When I look at you I don’t see you what I see is ME.

Marcie Prohofsky: Huh. This is for exact the reason why I mostly boycott fashion magazines. But then again I get an attack when I look at them and I really go down. That’s really a delightful afternoon when I do that. On that note, yeah she is ready, she nodded with such authority like bitch move on out I am so ready. Kids give it up for Yia and her love letter.

Yia: Deliver its midnight the sandlewood scent of you flow into me. I lean through the pillow where your body kissed the night before my pulse raises and the blood of my body burns as I think of you now. Your eyes caressed my soul with tender strength your breath fills my body with sweetness, your lips like plum wine sake trails hot liquid down my throat down down and set in the pit of my stomach uhmmm  how my stomach warms in twirling heat of blind lust, trails down to touch  the core of my pussy and ignites yellow pinchin lights, blood rushed down in my lips engorge fluttering at the spark of life and fire earthly lust washes over my body sending shivering waves out of my fingertips my skin calls out for your touch, longing, yearning for the warmth of your hands and the pressure of your body on top of me. Your lips linger on mine long after you’ve gone I can still feel your body in me sitting in my soul, you, your eyes the blue grey of your desire piercing to the depths of me I hold myself trace light touches over my stomach the way your strong hands linger so gently over my belly. You’ve inspired me to surrender to my words to my body to the throbbing of my heart a longing in my pussy she waits for you to penetrate and claim what is already yours.

Marcie Prohofsky: Uhmm, Okay, we’re gonna take a break. We’ll be back in ten minutes. This is Marcie Prohofsky for taste of sex. We’ll be back.

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Marcie Prohofsky: So roaming roaming roaming, yeah. We have a new friend in the house Linda Beth with a piece called Change.

Linda Beth: He would always call me, I never called me he’s been calling me for years, before JP and I became a couple he called me to set up our dates in hotels when JP and I were a couple he called me to have lunch then I felt I was being unfaithful to my boyfriend if I have lunch with him. Then JP and I separated for good and he started calling me again. “Come to Las Vegas,” he said, “No,” I said, he’s calling calling calling me. He’s a happily married man and lives with his wife in Tiburon. That’s what his website or his wife’s says. Yeah yeah yah last Monday afternoon I called him I was driving down the 101 and the sun was shining I was restless excited and horny. I just gotten back from LA and my show had gone really well he had us booked in to Phoenix Hotel in San Francisco in less than ten minutes. I went directly to Raw Stress for less and bought bathing suits so we could both swim in the pool at the Phoenix that’s kept at the perfect temperature. I bought a two piece pink and purpie tank top and Capri set with stars on it and a red necklace and a matching ring and a pink beach tote with pink flamingo, starfish and a sea horse printed on the front. I was in the heart of the tenderloin at 3pm. We hadn’t fucked in three months because we are trying so hard just to be friends. I ripped off his clothes. After the last orgasm he asked “Was it always this good?” “Yes” I said .We’re addicted to sex addicted addicted addicted. He rolled over and told me about his recent road trip alone to Joshua Tree about how of the solitude there had superseded his need for social diversion which he was also addicted to. We talked a long time and the conversation was very deep and he had to leave for dinner with his wife and the twelve family members who had just flown in from the mid west and I had dinner in the city with friends. I drove my VW bug out of the hotel parking lot turned right no Eddie left on Larkin and he was standing there in the crosswalk, waving, smiling at me broadly and then I flash back to that street in Midtown Manhattan in 2002 after we spent three days fucking in the Sofitel hotel and he had hailed me a taxi to put me in the taxi to go back in JFK to fly separately to San Francisco and when the taxicab door slammed, the taxi driver looked at him waving, smiling and said “He really loves you, doesn’t he?”. At that moment I drove past him in San Francisco and when he could no longer see me my body broke down shaking and I was crying because I could finally after seven years, feel the love. What had changed was, I had finally caught him, I had finally expressed my desire. What that meant was I was finally free.

Marcie Prohofsky: Uh, that was really satisfying, that piece, that was great, thank you. Okay, Leif ready? “Sure” he says. This is a piece called communicating. It is about ancient forms of communication. Ooh stay tuned.

Leif: My name is Leif. Communicating. She claws my back, I spank her ass. She bites my finger, I pull her hair. We’re really talking to each other. She forces my cock in her. I wrapped my arm around her belly from behind refusing her escape. I love angry sex. I flip her from position to position like a ragged doll. Her body going limp when she feels a shift to another coming. On her knees, she jaunts her sex up to my lips as if to say “talk to this fucker” and reaching back and grabbing my jaw, thumb in mouth pulls my head in her with all her strength. She doesn’t want words coming out in my mouth she had other uses for it now. The burn earlier remained hot some argument we had about blah blah blah. Now our bodies speak to each other without speech we iron things out. After sweating, out of breath, tired and full, she whispers in my ear “You are still a little angry huh baby?” but the soft smell of her hair filling my head I’m not and I pulled her into me. And as I fall asleep I wonder how many languages we each have to communicate with each other, language, languages that serves us better than words. So much is exchanged when I look in someone’s eyes, when we hug. I fantasized spending a year without one spoken word where could we all go in that silence of intention alone.

Marcie Prohofsky: Hmm, all these pieces have this really sweet endings, reminds you when I was acting and one of my acting coach has always wanted for all audition pieces always like what’s the button like have a button on the end. So it’s just like all these buttons all these nipples just wanna pinch `em. We have 5 minutes and 40 seconds for more pinching nipples and were gonna have a Haddas  straight in New York here to tell you how to pinch your nipple alright or maybe not she shakes her head . She’ll take you on another ride ‘m sure. Alright baby, hmm you look hot.

Haddas: Thank you
Marcie Prohofsky: Eye shadow and all…

Haddas: Just for you baby. Okay. It’s been a while since we’ve done this. Its uncomfortable, I’m used to doing this with people I’m not close to. But how I feel when he sees me like this open and vulnerable without me being able to hide it. I worry abut him how embarrassing it must be for him. I wonder from coercing him into this if he would rather have sex instead. He seems concerned about the time but we go for it. Anyways, he fingers heads my clit trying to and I’m already in my struggle trying to squeeze out, turn on, must get turned on must get high here and then I noticed I can’t feel his finger, I can barely feel his finger I have to slow down my usual struggle wont work here his light teasing strokes slow me down, like like he plays me up in his finger and my clit feels like a soft warm snake moving inside me hmmm…all of a sudden I hit it yes come in I want you, I want sex I feel my clit sucking him in closing down on him give it to me fill me up its always a wonder to me how I can go from close to sex starved in a moment and back again is there no other way I suckle his finger some more then we go down and I start resisting again afraid the moment won’t last my clit starts to contract clenched I’m worried it’ll stay this way and it does for a long moment moments im which I think I’m stuck here we go again this is how its gonna be why I cant let go interspersed of deep opening and yes I want you and then clenching again open closed open closed open closed closed closed open I want it I’m stuck here he brings me slowly down and then dresses and leaves me for the evening leaves me in the sweet space of wanting more.

Marcie Prohofsky: I wanna hear more about this snake, the snake I want you all look for a snake. Okay?
Thank you for listening for a taste of sex erotic poetry reading. For online transcripts of this show go to personalifemedia.com, and for more information about one taste including our erotic open mic nights workshops and other events check out onetaste.us. Tune in next week for more taste of erotica I’m Marcie Prohofsky thank you again for listening.