Episode 19: Knottyboys - "Pretty Tied Up" - Episode 1 of 2

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JD and Dan - Two Knotty Boys - have a mission: Demystify bondage, put the fun into it, while making it safer and much more aestheticly pleasing. They join Beth Crittenden in this playful interview that lays out the basics, including why one may explore bondage and how to do it safely. Rope Bondage is the most popular sexual fantasy kink out there...and why is that? One reason is that many partners get caught up in feeling like they have to reciprocate and this keeps them from fully enjoying and surrendering to the experience. When one is tied up, there is nothing to do but surrender, and there is such pleasure and healing in that experience. If you have ever been curious about rope bondage, or fantasized about being tied up, this interview will support you in pushing your edge and exploring, and what could be better than that?

Transcript

Knottyboys – “Pretty Tied Up” – Episode 1 of 2

Intro
This program brought to you by personallifemedia.com is suitable for mature audiences only and may contain explicit sexual information.

This is part 1 of a two part program.

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Beth Crittenden:  Hello everyone and welcome to A Taste of Sex guest speaker interviews on Personal Life Media.  I am your host Beth Crittenden here from One Taste Urban Retreat Center in San Francisco, California.  We are speaking tonight with two naughty boys JD and Dan who are rope instructors.  They’re actually a rope bondage duo who lead workshops and performances.  They’ve written a book called ‘Two Knotty Boys Showing You the Rope’ and lots of other things we’re going to get into just in a moment here but before I get to that, I want to let you know about One Taste Urban Retreat Center in case you have not heard about it.

We are a community run organization where we have been practice in common called orgasmic meditation.  It’s a way that people can feel more, can connect more, can learn lots others know about life and study it deeply and have a lot of fun in the process.  So at the retreat center we have an organic café, we have a massage studio, we have yoga every hour on the hour and it’s just…it’s a great place to be so come check it out if you’re anywhere near San Francisco or if you’d like to visit here, you’re welcome to.

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Join us today on A Taste of Sex guest speaker interviews as two knotty boys JD and Dan dispel myths about central rope bondage and let you know which type of rope to use and why and also learn what you can get out of rope bondage, why would you tie someone out, get hints about how to get into the scene whether you want to keep it behind closed doors or hit the road and also just learn how to explore your kink side and do it in a safe and connected way.

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And thanks for joining us today JD and Dan.

Dan:  Hi, I am Dan.

JD:  I am JD.

Dan:  And we’re the two knotty boys with a ‘K’ not an ‘N’ as we’re in knott, knotty, not in that way anyway.

Beth Crittenden:  Right, so what are you going to be teaching tonight?

JD:  Tonight we’re teaching sensual rope bondage here at One Taste and the course itself covers a lot of our more signature ties, ties that you can tie quickly and skillfully and artistically in the privacy of your own home or balcony for that matter but the course is about two hours and it’s just a way to put a little extra something up your sleeve when it comes to sensuality.

Dan:  There’s a lot of times you wind up with…you have a lover who wants to be tied up and if you don’t know the skills that you can do or how easy it is to do it, you can be kind of caught up in a bind or not caught up in bind as the case maybe.  So we’ll help you through those moments and give you some really basic ties that are safe and very sensual and really add to the experience.

Beth Crittenden:  For someone who has never done this before, what’s the appeal of either tying someone up or being tied up?

JD:  It depends on the person.  We always say that there’s nothing they live up to, you bring yourself to these workshops and we just give you the skills to go back home with and sort of utilize per your discretion.  For some people they’re like slowing down the sensual process, elongating in a sort of extending the exchange between themselves in their lovers.

Such a bondage situation is also, it turns people on.  It gives in like a sense of escape, a sense of fantasy, a sense of release.  Some people said that when they’re bound, they don’t feel the sense that they have to do something, you know, they can actually submit to the engagement, to the sensual exchange that they’re having.

Dan:  Yeah, bondage is just about the most popular sexual fantasy out there and that’s listed in terms of the kink aspect but, and why is that, its not because people necessarily want to be overpowered or kidnapped or anything like that…

JD:  Kidnapped or overtaken or straight or something like that….

Dan:  Yeah, but there’s a lot of neat things why someone might want to be tied up and that includes the ability to totally… because the reciprocity aspect of sex sometimes gets in the way where people are afraid to enjoy themselves because they know that they’re going to have to please their partner…

Beth Crittenden:  We call it OZs you owe each other.

Dan:  Exactly, OZs you know, rather than just saying, calling it a 69 and own layer, you can, when you tie someone up and when the person is tied up, they are freed from the obligation they have to reciprocate and that enables them to totally focus, have all that attention and sensuality focused on them and for them to just sit back and enjoy it and it also for lot of people, they get off on the idea that they are freed from any sort of guilt of engaging in a woody deep sensual act because they can say this choice has been taken away from you, I am tied up so I can totally enjoy and they don’t have to feel any residual guilt that might have been brought up with.

JD:  Yeah, and that’s from the perspective of the person being tied, from the perspective of the person tying, there’s a lot of ego that gets involved, there’s a lot of like trepidation and fear that they’re not going to live up to the expectations of the person they’re tying, that they might not tie skillfully or they may look uncool or they basically just don’t know what they’re doing and so, our workshop series effectively try to breakthrough those boundaries and give people, we call the rules of cool and because they come to our workshops really is to learn how to look cool.

They want to know how to tie quickly and skillfully and elegantly and safely…

Dan:  And without losing wood.

JD:  Yeah, exactly and in a way that makes them feel like secure enough about their rope skills so that they can actually focus on the person they’re tying and Dan and I are famous for saying ‘we’re not going to teach you how to tie rope, we’re going to teach you how to tie people’ and people have feelings and people have sensitivities and people have discomforts and comfort levels that they want to be teased and tantalized and knowing the connection that you have with the person you’re with and being present enough to be aware of the person you’re with is really what we’re all about.

We’re giving you the rope skills so you can break into that zone of real connection so you don’t have to worry about how am I going to tie this and where this rope go and how I tie this off, you’ve already learned that part.  Now you can be present.

Dan:  Yeah, and another nice thing about rope bondage that JD eluded you earlier was that it extends the process.  It’s a great aspect of foreplay.  Just imagine how sensual it is to tap yards of rope being drawn across your skin and tied upon you and having the face-to-face connection or the mouth-to-ear or mouth-to-body connection while you’re tying somebody up and being tied up, it really is a great extension of foreplay.

Beth Crittenden:  Nice, and you’ve said that your goal is to demystify bondage and put the fun into it while making it safer and much more astatically pleasing.  Tell us about the safe and the astatically pleasing, what does that add to it?

JD:  Can I go?

Dan:  Ok.

JD:  As far as the astatics are concerned a lot of rope bondage that’s on the web or that you may have seen the videos that people have rented is pretty sloppy.  In many cases, it’s also very unsafe.  Some people will sort of over compensate for a lack of knowledge by tying tighter.  They say well I really want to bind this person down so I am going to really tie tighter and that compensation, that for a lack of knowledge ultimately leads to unsafe situation where you’re cutting off restriction, you may be seriously injuring someone that you truly are connected to sensually or more or so love and so what we want to show is that you can tie skillfully and you can tie functionally meaning that it will restrain your partner and beautifully and about the same amount of time that will take you to tie something got awfully and so you just basically learn a few basic skills that Dan and I teach and the rest is really up to you.

We often say that we want to show you the notes and you write the symphony and so we’ll show you how to tie safely, we’ll tell you how to tie skillfully and you take those and mix them up in whatever sort of dynamic you’d like to, to create a sensual and connected bondage scene.

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Beth Crittenden:  How do you recommend people start a conversation with their partners.  Let’s say one person is having a fantasy about it.  They want to try it and they’re not quite sure if their partner is going to be receptive or not, what do they do?

Dan:  Well, we find that buying the book ‘Two Knotty Boys Showing the Ropes’ and putting in front of your partner.  The best way to get knowledge…totally kidding.

JD:  It’s anyway but it’s not…

Dan:  One of the most, the least threatening ways to talk about this type of fantasy is to simply talk about how, boy, I really you know, I really like it when… you just mention to your partner about how you’ve had the idea of the fantasy of being tied up and/or do you know any knots or do you have any rope or anything like that and see where it goes from there and just drop hints that way and see their reaction.

JD:  Yeah, the workshops are nice too.  We’ve met a lot of couples who start off with dinner and they went to a workshop and they went home and practiced.  It’s kind of like we’re just practicing is one way to go about it.  I tend to be more forward and myself, I tend to say hey, here’s this and that and let’s go for it.

You can initiate everything for fun cause, you don’t have to work with the rope, you can work with just like leather strands or fun softer strands, whatever feels comfortable for you and bondage is broader than just engagement with the rope but I think it’s sassy and smart just to kind of put it out there.

I had a friend for example that want to be spanked but didn’t want her partner, didn’t want to have to ask permission to be spanked.  Do you want to say, I want you to spank me, will you spank me, and so when her partner was away, I wrote ‘Spank me’ on her ass and when the night got to that point, she pulled her panties down and there it was and so he got the hint and started spanking her.

So you just got to be playful and I think sometimes you have to be, people over there have a little bit of you know, a rubber hammer, you know just be a little obvious, sometimes the hints is what kills us the most because we look oh god, I left [??] God, I bought that book but he hasn’t picked it up or she hasn’t even picked up the rope and it’s like, do you have to say, hey babe, tie me up, and no, I never did.

Sometimes you just got to be obvious about it.

Dan:  And that can be playful on the side of the person who has a rope.  So if you want to tie somebody up just bring out the rope and just kind of do some playful stuffs…

JD:  And start slow, you don’t have to rush to heavy duty stuff.  It could be, you know hands in front of you, it could be handkerchiefs, it could be anything that you feel comfortable with.  In fact, sometimes that works better than rope.  Tie with something that they’re familiar with, like handkerchief has been dangling off of a bedpost for months on and so it’s something that you’ve become acquainted with and so it doesn’t seem as intimidating or foreign to the room.

You’re just tying with that handkerchief, it’s been lying there for years.  Yeah, taking your time, laughing, keeping the sense of humor that’s huge.

Beth Crittenden:  Sounds great, thank you.  We’re going to take a short break to support our sponsors now on Personal Life Media.  For anyone who wants more information about Two Knotty Boys, schedule their workshops, their book, anything else, you can visit knottyboys.com and please do join us after the break.  We will be getting into more specific stories about rope bondage.

Before we wrap up, do you guys want to add anything else?

Dan:  I think that pretty much covers it, as far as me…

JD:  Where are your seatbelts Diva?

Dan:  That’s right, make sure…yeah, a lot of people, something that often aren’t asked about in interviews is the choice of our rope.

JD:  Oh that’s true.

Dan:  So a lot of the bondage that you see out there, particularly Japanese inspired bondage like Shibari and Hogi Gitsu…well I know Hogi Gitsu, they use ahem… ahem, which is a type of manila rope, most people and it’s a brown, scratchy, natural fiber rope and that’s very popular for what that’s used for, particularly in Japanese set and we’ve kind of break from that and we use a softer rope because it’s, we like to use, ok three, seven 16 inch nylon, solid…

JD:  Solid breed nylon rope and just to be honest, ahem can be soft, it has to be treated but it’s very expensive, it’s a very elusive rope to purchase and so a hundred feet of ahem will cost you many hundreds of dollars.  We like to be sort of the middle-class people, we know that you’ve got their jobs and lives and budgets…

Beth Crittenden:  And you’re living in Brisbane and you have the kids…

JD:  Exactly, you’ve got two kids to take care of them and…

Dan:  And the home [??] really nearby.

JD:  Yeah, so like it’s cost effective.  You can buy 100 feet of solid bred nylon rope for about $25.00, you can die it whatever color you like, it’s soft against the skin.  It holds knots excellently and its easy to untie and it just feels soaky and it supports the weight over a wider area because it is a thicker rope and we tend to use that and so you’ll see that online and we’ll have you, and we’ve sort of increased the popularity of solid bred nylon, not all polymers are evil says the day time chemist and so it is what we use and it’s worked for us since when we teach.

So that’s one thing that is different from us, we do not teach and with the power I do occasionally tie with it.  So don’t think I am a hypocrite if you see [??]

Dan:  Hypocrite?

Beth Crittenden:  So just a reminder also that if people want to find your schedule or your buyers, photos of your work, they can visit www.knottyboys.com and also you can check their work out on YouTube.com.

Dan:  And myspace/twoknottyboys.

Beth Crittenden:  Great, and the name of your book again is Two Knotty Boys showing you the rope, and where do people find it?

Dan:  Yeah, showing you the ropes with an end.

Beth Crittenden:  Much more than one rope.

JD:  Yeah, you can purchase the book at, or see your local bookstores, Barns & Nobles and Carriers and also Good Wives, you know whatever your local bookstore is, go walk in and ask for it’ll be there…

Dan:  Stormy Leather…

JD:  Stormy Leather, yeah, just a lots of places or carriers, you can also get on the Amazon.com, you can get it on Barns&Noble.com Borders.com, anywhere they sell books.

Dan:  And you can come to workshop and we can send it for you.

JD:  We can send one right in front of you.

Beth Crittenden:  Great.  Well thank you so much for speaking with me here today and…

Dan:  Thank you.

Beth Crittenden:  It’s been great meeting you.

JD:  Thank you Beth.

Beth Crittenden:  Yes, this has been a Taste of Sex, guest speaker interviews on PersonalLifeMedia.  I am your host Beth Crittenden here today with Two Knotty Boys, JD and Dan.  This was great fun.  Thanks for joining us.  If you would like text and transcripts of the show to find out which rope it is to get again, you can visit www.personallifemedia.com.

You can also send us an email with any feedback or any other questions to [email protected].  To check out One Taste schedule, including this lecture series or our connect at workshops, visit www.onetastesf.com and tune in and turn on for the next show.

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This concludes part 1.  The interview will be continued in the next episode of this show.

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Announcer: Find more great shows, like this, on www.PersonalLifeMedia.com.