Asanas - Beyond Sex Positions
New positions are possibly the best way to introduce variety and interest into a sexual relationship. They can be exciting, a little challenging, and often inspiring. There are really only a handful of basic position categories but there are many, many variations on each of the basic ones, leading to greater pleasure for any couple.
Asanas or Positions of the Kama Sutra
The Kama Sutra is often seen as the ultimate catalog of sexual positions. It's a good start but there are other love manuals with different positions and techniques that the Kama Sutra doesn't detail. The basic categories are: Man on Top, Woman on Top, Rear-entry, Lying down, Standing and really esoteric ones using furniture, yoga positions and the out-of-doors. Explore the variations within each, rather than trying to remember 1001 different positions. If something you read or see excites you, try it several times to really get the feel of it.
You can count on having new things to talk about and learn together when you investigate new positions. When exploring them with a sense of fun, they will lead to laughter, confusion, communication, and a sense of accomplishment. You'll probably find that some will work well for you, and some just won't work at all. One of the great discoveries about positions is that after you've tried a few new ones, much of your awkwardness or reluctance will disappear. You'll find yourself being willing to try other new things with your lover. That's what makes exploring different positions so important. This form of trying something new will often lead to a transformed sexual relationship.
Not only are new positions fun to try they are often the key for women to learn how to increase their pleasure and help create the possibility of vaginal or G-spot orgasms. Men will also get much more satisfaction from intercourse by discovering positions that increase their stamina and give them better control over how long they last.
The Great Variety of Positions
There are as many positions for sexual intercourse as there are possibilities in the creative mind. Having an open and adventurous mind will help you and your partner bring more playful energy into the quest for new, exciting sexual pursuits like exploring positions. Keep your spirit open to extraordinary possibilities and they will come.
Explorers of the Past
Can you even begin to imagine how many couples have studied the love guides from the past? Maybe millions - you are in good company. Love guides from India, China, Persia, Japan, Arabia, and even some of the North American Indian tribes have found their way into our modern culture. Many have a history of being secret societies and the teachings were only available to a few. It is a gift to have the wisdom of the scholars that put down these teachings in writing for us today.
Sexual positions held a more important role than we think of them today. They were often thought to be magical diagrams that lovers would arrange themselves in for spiritual transcendence. Not only yogic skills but conscious effort was put into forming the shapes and creating the experiences for extraordinary sexual intimacy.
A Subtle Shift Equals Perfection
There are many subtle variations on each major group of positions. Don't abandon a new position right away if it's not working for you. See what happens when you move a leg a little to the left or right or put a pillow under your bottom to lift your pelvis or shift from one knee to the other.
Ancient cultures that advanced lovemaking to an art form kept many props close by to help them. Have available pillows of varying sizes and shapes like crescent moons, rounds and squares to use under heads, arms, legs, buttocks, tummies and feet to subtly change angles and positions. High headboards, love swings, and even the floor may all have their place in your lovemaking repertoire. Get creative and keep it fun!
For More Fun - Communicate
When trying anything new, keep the communicating going. Say what you like and what doesn't work for you. The truth is you both really want to know what the other one wants and likes.
Remember, very few of us are mind readers, and our partner may change their mind, anyway. So when in doubt, ask. If your partner is quieter than you are, encourage them to speak. Ask "multiple-choice" questions, such as, "Do you prefer that I do this faster or slower?" or "Do you like this harder or softer?" Even if the answer is "none of the above," just knowing that you care can give partners the courage to speak up.
Suzie Heumann is the founder of www.tantra.com. She is a filmmaker, writer, speaker and author.
Visit Suzie's site to learn more!